What is the biblical fix for sexual brokenness?

We have just seen how Jesus, in the case of His restored apostle, not only forgave his sin, but made Peter to judge the very root of the bad thing in him, that had caused his fall. There is not only repentance and forgiveness, but also the practical cleansing. God is faithful and just, not only "to forgive our sins," but, it is added, "to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." Let us not forget it!

Do not err: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor pathics, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners shall inherit the kingdom of God. And these things were some of you; but ye got washed, but ye were sanctified, but ye were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God (1 Cor. 6:9-11). How real and great is the depravity of man left to himself and Satan! How real and still greater is the delivering grace of God in the name of the Lord Jesus and by His own Spirit! In Jesus He has revealed Himself to us; and, as we were the slaves of lust and passion under the power of Satan, He by Jesus wrought a work to rescue all who believe with a sure title, and made it good in our souls by His Spirit. For where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty, as well as power, love, and a sound mind.

The exhortation which follows in verse 12, addressed not to the world but to justified believers, proves that sin is still in the mortal body of the believer. It is not destroyed. But while sin is in our mortal body, it has no more right to reign there. However it will reign, if we yield to the desires of the old nature. If a believer obeys the old nature in its lusts, he walks not in the Spirit but in the flesh. Whenever temptation comes, the believer must take refuge in prayer, in self-judgment and self-surrender and yield (or present) his members afresh as instruments of righteousness unto God. As long as the believer is in the mortal body there is the conflict between the flesh and the Spirit (Galatians 5:17). And if we walk in the Spirit we shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh; this necessitates that we make no provision for the flesh to fulfil the lusts thereof (Romans 13:14). Furthermore, the promise is given to the believer in Christ that sin shall not have dominion over him because he is not under the law, but under grace. The grace which has saved the believing sinner and made Him nigh unto God, teaches also to deny ungodliness and worldly lusts and to live soberly, righteously and godly in this present age (Titus 2:12). And more than that; grace supplies the power to live godly. Therefore sin shall not have dominion over a believer because he is under grace. But this promise must be appropriated in faith.

"Flee fornication." In this one is not told to fight, but to keep far from it, as Joseph fled from the wife of Potiphar. Other sins may not involve the body in this way, but this is sin against one's own body. And as well as our bodies being the members of Christ, now we are told, "Your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost." The Spirit of God dwells within our body in order to display in us the precious reality of His character in our practical lives. Notice that it is not said that our spirits or souls are His temple, but our bodies. So that when we are told, "Ye are not your own," we cannot regard this as being merely in regard to our spiritual interests, but fully applicable to our bodies. Being bought with a price - a price so infinitely great - certainly we are totally the property of the Living God; and it is only right and becoming that we should glorify God in our body.

It is ever the great effort of the enemy to entrap believers into sin by tempting us to gratify the flesh in some form or other. He knows the particular form of gratification that will appeal to each one, and tempts us accordingly. To meet his temptations we are instructed to arm ourselves against sin by having the same mind as Christ — the mind to suffer rather than yield to sin. If we yield, the flesh does not suffer; on the contrary it is gratified: but we sin, and in due course suffer the governmental consequences of sinning. If we refuse to yield to sin, the flesh suffers, but we cease from sin, and live to the will of God, enjoying the blessedness of so doing.

In today’s society self-denial is seen as a negative idea. The view most people around us take today is that you have a right to live out all your wishes and desires. But the life of a Christian is often connected with sacrifice. In a Christian marriage each partner makes sacrifices out of love. Living out your desires in an egoistic way is unthinkable in this context. Therefore, the unmarried believer should be willing to deny himself or herself in order to live a life of sexual abstinence for the Lord’s sake and His honour.

Sexual desire may become very strong so the requirement to live in this way may be considered a hard imposition. In such a case it is helpful if the young Christian concerned talks confidentially to a mature Christian of the same sex or a couple to find the help, support and prayer he or she needs. Beware of any ‘alternative solution’ (masturbation, pornography, films, etc.)! This will only make you unhappy and increase your burdens, and it will bring you into spiritual free fall. ‘For the rest, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are noble, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are amiable, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue and if any praise, think on these things’ (Phil. 4:8).

Verses 8, 9. "I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry," etc. Giving still its due precedence to a single life, he acknowledges in all a common and sacred right of choice, while on some he enjoins, as an escape from spiritual danger, a course which, for its own sake merely, he would rather have them shun; for fretting desire is a hurtful soul disease. Godliness, with contentment, is great gain; without it godliness itself becomes endangered. A man must be his own judge in this matter. Marriage is honourable if he choose it; but his choice will bring its consequences. Can he live single with an unrepining heart? By all means let him do so; for the present calling of God is not to vineyards and oliveyards, or temporal happiness or opulence of any kind, but to suffer for awhile with Christ, and then to reign with Him. The fewer natural claims a Christian has upon his time and energies, the freer will he be to follow with a single eye the Master whom he is allowed to serve.9 But let him know his proper gift, and aim no higher than God gives him strength to reach.

It may seem strange that the apostle, after affirming that it is good for a man not to touch a woman, yet fully approves every man and woman having a spouse. His first statement in verse I could not have been written when creation began, for it would have been bad for Adam to have refused the wife God gave to him. But in Christ now raised from the dead, God has introduced the new creation, and Paul himself is an example of the fact that the power of Christ, now known and enjoyed, is such as to be able to lift one above the perfectly normal and legitimate needs of the first creation. In no way are these things themselves sinful, though they have often been corrupted by man's sin. So that, while it is good for one to remain unmarried, in view of thorough devotedness to the Lord; yet if this would in any way involve the danger of fornication, it was much better to marry.

Verses 3 to 5 would insist that, when married, both wife and husband are responsible to show full consideration of each other according to the proper character of the marriage bond. They are one flesh, and neither the husband alone, nor the wife alone, has power in reference to his own or her own body, to bear fruit. They are united, and must not ignore this sacred relationship. By consent they could be apart for a time, to give themselves to fasting and prayer, and no doubt this could be greatly used of God in blessing; but it was generally not to be too long protracted, for Satan is ever ready to take advantage of such things. Proper consideration of each other is the important matter, and no defrauding of one another of his or her proper rights in the marriage relationship.

But while there is a simple severity of truth which faith acknowledges, and to the practical attainment of which it both may and is encouraged to aspire, the provisions of divine grace are designed to meet the infirmity of the flesh, as well as to satisfy the desires of the Spirit. He who has called us to the fellowship of His Son, yet considers our frame, and remembers that we still are dust;6 and while refusing any countenance to sin, provides honourably for the need of those who, with a clear perception of their standing, and a full acceptance of the apostle's dictum as a maxim of true spiritual wisdom, find celibacy a burden both difficult and dangerous to bear. Accordingly the express sanction of Christian marriage, declared in the following verse, is administered as a corrective of a known and still existing evil in the Church.

On the other hand, God has expressed His will in His Word as to many things that have to do with our practical, daily lives. Do we rejoice in His expressed will as to what our conduct should be? These things we may know absolutely also, as for instance, "This is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality." Many other scriptures show us clearly what kind of conduct is right and becoming. Let us be well acquainted with these through reading and meditation.