Then Esau said, “Let us journey on our way, and I will go ahead of you.”
Jacob and the brother he dreaded have just met on friendly terms. Now Esau wants the two families to travel on together, with himself in the lead. It raises a plain question: what do you do when the world offers to walk with you — and to set the pace?
The Offer on the Road
The proposal is friendly and practical. Esau has four hundred men and is heading to Seir; Jacob has flocks, herds and small children. One writer sets out the exchange:
L. M. GrantNow that they have met on friendly terms, Esau proposes that they travel together to Seir, with Esau going ahead (v. 12). Jacob replies, plausibly enough, that he and his large company could not keep pace with Esau's four hundred men. The flocks and herds with young must not be overdriven, and his children were young too.
Two Men, Two Directions
The awkwardness is not about walking speed. These two brothers belonged to two different worlds, and that is why travelling as one company was never going to work:
J. G. BellettJacob was the man of God; Esau was the man of the world. The principle of faith was in the one, the principle of nature in the other… "Friendship with the world is enmity with God." And this was Esau. So Esau made the earth the scene of his energies, his enjoyments, and his expectations.
A Plausible Answer That Was Not True
Jacob's reasons were sensible. His intentions were not. Kelly is blunt about it: Jacob answered his brother with words he never meant to keep.
William KellyThe truth is, that he was most anxious to get rid of his brother, and that he had not the smallest intention of going to Seir. He was going to Succoth. Viewed in the light of God, Jacob was not truthful in what he said to his brother. Evil was still unjudged in those around him. He spoke with little conscience, but with his usual gift for excuses.
Fear Dressed Up as Courtesy
Behind the excuses sits fear. Jacob had already tried to soften Esau with gifts and had called him "my lord." Handling the man of the world by your own schemes costs something:
The Christian's FriendInstead of remembering God's word, "I will be with you," and that God's host had met him, he turns again to schemes of the flesh. He wants to "find grace in the eyes of" and to "appease" "my lord Esau"… But we put ourselves under the men of the world when we use worldly, deceitful ways in our dealings with them.
And the danger had already passed. Jacob had planned for either outcome in advance:
William KellyHe lifted up his eyes and looked; but God was greater than his fears. He still planned the best he could, whether Esau came as a friend or as an enemy. Here we can hardly say that Jacob walked by faith and not by sight; but God was faithful in His providence.
The Excuse That Holds a Real Truth
Commentators differ on how honest the excuse was. Tender flocks and small children cannot march at the speed of armed men, and one writer draws a lesson from it for anyone leading others:
F. B. HoleJacob called his gift "my blessing," but despite this he was in no way eager to have Esau's company on the rest of his journey. His plea in verse 13 was no doubt a genuine one. It applies among the people of God today. There are always some who are young and tender, who must not be overdriven. Those who have reached the stature and activity of full-grown men must remember this. They must not force the pace of their weaker brothers and sisters and so ruin them. This has damaged many a young and tender believer.
Where He Went
Jacob was right not to join Esau. But the way he refused left him drifting, and where he went next says more than his words did:
G. C. WillisThen Esau said, "Let us go together," but Jacob did not want to. Was he still afraid?… But he did not really wish to be with Esau; instead, he went to Succoth where he built a house. Neither his father Isaac nor his grandfather Abraham had built any house. God called Jacob to be a stranger and a pilgrim in Canaan. Would a stranger build a house? Where was his tent?
Summary
- Offer. Esau proposes a shared journey with himself in front — the man of the world asking to set the direction for the man of faith.
- Fear. Jacob's problem was never Esau's strength but his own unbelief. God was greater than his fears, yet he still planned as if He were not.
- Excuse. His reasons were sound, but they covered an intention he never had. He said he would come to Seir; he never meant to.
- Drift. Avoiding Seir took him to Succoth, where the pilgrim built a house instead of pitching a tent.
- Pace. The one true thing in his plea still stands — the young and weak must not be driven at the speed of the strong.