Where/how do you draw the line between helping someone and allowing someone to take advantage of you?

As to giving to everyone who asks from us, this must be subject to sober wisdom; for someone may ask for a large amount to be spent on a project that is questionable, and concern for his own good might be reason to refuse this. We must also draw a firm line when people claiming to be the Lord's servants, urge us to give to their particular work. There are too many who take advantage of Christianity to make money. But if one is in need and asks for something to relieve that need, we ought to be fully prepared to give to him what is necessary. This attitude will result, by God's intervention, in receiving back in the same measure that we willingly give (v.38). The Lord is seeking in all of this to draw out the genuine faith of His people. He is certainly not "browbeating" His own! Also, if one has taken away what belongs to us, faith will make no demands for its return (v.30). However, if one borrows from another and forgets to repay him, it would be only right to remind the person of this, not because we want our rights, but to encourage the other person's reliability.

Our Lord says, in verse 42, "Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away." It is an example of a great general principle that the Lord is insisting upon; as He had laid bare the character of violence, so here of another thing — the solicitation that addresses itself to the kindness of heart of a Christian. "Give to him that asketh thee." Most certainly this is a comely and a gracious thing; but it is perfectly plain the Lord is not pressing upon His people that the thing be done heedlessly, nor as a mere gratification of their feelings, but with a conscience towards God. Supposing a person came to ask you for something, and you have reason to think that he would spend it improperly, you must limit it. Why not? He might say to you, Did not the Lord enjoin, "Give to him that asketh thee?" Certainly; but the Lord has given certain other words by which I judge as to the propriety of giving in each particular case. The asker might be going to do what I am sure would be absurd or wrong; am I still to give? or is not another principle introduced, namely, due discrimination? Perhaps he that asks has plans of his own which I believe to be worldly: am I to gratify his worldliness? What the Lord has in view is real need; and as there was wont to be great indifference to this among the Jews, as indeed such is apt to be everywhere, the Lord not merely insists upon the Christian helping his brother, but takes the broadest ground in urging generous giving; not, of course, for anything we may get by it, but out of love according to God.

"Give to him that asketh thee." We all know there are those who would impose. This shuts up and often hinders pity; and it may oftener still be an excuse for not showing pity. The Lord is guarding against the snare, and shows the great moral value, for our own souls and for the glory of God, of habitual, considerate, ungrudging kindness towards the distressed in this world. Not that I am always to give what a person asks, for he may seek something foolish; but still "Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away." Do you count up how often you have been deceived? Even then why be sore? You are entitled, at the word of Jesus, to do it as unto your Father. The receiver of your bounty may apply it to a bad use: that is his responsibility. I am bound to cultivate unsuspicious generosity, and this quite independent of mere friendship. Even the publicans and sinners are kind to those who are kind to them; but what ought a Christian to be? Christ determines the position, conduct and spirit of the Christian. As He was a sufferer, they are not to resist evil. If there was need, the Lord's heart went out to it. They might turn His love against Himself, and use the gifts of His grace for their own purposes, like the man who was healed, heedless of the Lord's warning and the sense of His benefits. But the Lord, perfectly knowing it all, goes on steadfastly in His path of doing good, not in the mere vague thought of benevolence to man, but in the holy service of His Father.

But would it be right to give, if we knew the person would make an ill use of it? Must we use that as an excuse if we have been victimised? How ready some people are to borrow? Surely there are counter-truths to guide us in all these questions. The good man spoken of in Ps. 112 will not only "show favour and lend," but "will guide his affairs with discretion." There is a guard for us. Suppose a thoroughly lazy man, who will not work though able, but lives by borrowing — 2 Thess. 3:10 affords direction for us. That supposes a man who refuses to work when he can. There may be an excellent brother out of work, and in need, and it is a privilege to help such. But Scripture is given us to guide in all cases. It is not a book of rules, though all scripture is the rule to the christian, and where saints wait on the Lord He knows how to make plain. There are cases for exhortation. The very word that says, "From him that would borrow of thee turn thou not away," says also, "Owe no man anything." And a christian in a right state of soul would not be happy to owe any man anything. A christian is not governed by the world's standard. If one, for instance, becomes bankrupt and gets a "legal" release from the payment of his debts in full, is he not still before the Lord, morally responsible, though legally acquitted?

So in helping God's saints who have got into actual debt through their folly, I believe the way is not to help them without sincere repentance on their part, and a resolve to walk in the ways of the word in regard to those things, which says, Owe no man anything, but to love one another. (Rom. 13:8.) If I help a saint, for instance, encouraging him thereby to set up in business without capital to carry it out; I am only encouraging him in a path of dishonour to the Lord, in which the Lord can by no means go with me. Under the government of God I believe the principle is true as set forth in Psalm 37:25: "I have been young and now am old, and yet saw I never the righteous forsaken nor his seed begging their bread." God has promised food and raiment to His children (Matt. 6:24-34), with the caution, Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you. The words, "Are ye not much better than the fowls? How much more shall he not clothe you, oh ye of little faith?" come in with unmistakable truth to faith wherever it is. Again, Your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. See also Luke 12:22-31. Again, Let your conversation be without covetousness, and be content with such things as you have, for He hath said, I will never leave thee nor forsake thee, so that we can boldly say, The Lord is my helper, I will not fear what man can do unto me. (Heb. 13:5-6.) All these sure promises ought to give confidence to the saints in the care of the Father, and prevent then from ever getting into debt, like other men. And indeed how can I give to others if I am in debt myself? I am then giving what is not my own, a terribly solemn thing when it is professedly done in the name of the Lord: I am taking what ought to be in another man's pocket, and giving it to the Lord. Is not this hypocrisy?

"For each one shall bear his own load" (v.5). In the final analysis, though we may at present "bear one another's burdens," each one of us is solitarily responsible only for our own work. We cannot transfer responsibility from ourselves to someone else. Nor should we have such an attitude as did Peter at one time, saying, "But Lord, what about this man?" (Jn.21:21). Therefore, while it is important that we have genuine compassion and care for others, we must not expect others to take responsibility for us, nor concern ourselves with what is their responsibility.

With this humility and brokenness, the apostle connects heart-searching and examination of one's ways. "But let every man prove his own work, and then shall he have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another. For every man shall bear his own burden" (Gal. 6:4-5). Gal. 6:5 in no way contradicts Gal. 6:2. In the earlier verse it is a question of sympathy with one another's infirmities. We are to be helpers of each other, bearing one another's burdens (bare). Here it is responsibility where each must stand alone; "every man shall bear his own burden" (phortion). Responsibility cannot be shifted to other shoulders; each individual saint will have to render his own account to God. Solemn consideration! We are apt to lose sight of the judgment-seat of Christ where all that we have done in the body will be gone into by the Lord. But to overlook it is dangerous. Grace does not do away with responsibility, but rather deepens it.

With this humility and brokenness, the apostle connects heart-searching and examination of one's ways. "But let every man prove his own work, and then shall he have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another. For every man shall bear his own burden" (Gal. 6:4-5). Gal. 6:5 in no way contradicts Gal. 6:2. In the earlier verse it is a question of sympathy with one another's infirmities. We are to be helpers of each other, bearing one another's burdens (bare). Here it is responsibility where each must stand alone; "every man shall bear his own burden" (phortion). Responsibility cannot be shifted to other shoulders; each individual saint will have to render his own account to God. Solemn consideration! We are apt to lose sight of the judgment-seat of Christ where all that we have done in the body will be gone into by the Lord. But to overlook it is dangerous. Grace does not do away with responsibility, but rather deepens it.

[4] This is the fourth point. Walking in step each one has his or her own responsibility. I cannot take someone else’s responsibility. If I interfere with somebody else’s responsibility I cause this other person to walk out of step, and that was what the Judaizers did. Paul says, “Bear ye one another’s burdens,”and “For every man shall bear his own burden.”It is the same word in English, but in the Greek there is a difference, for a different word is used in verse 2, meaning a heavy burden or a load. This can be a tremendous thing or it can be a small thing in our eyes, but there the point is that we should be available to help, whereas in verse 5 the word is used for something that you can andshould carry yourself, it is your own responsibility which nobody else can or should take, it clearly is a different word. It is a word we find also in Matthew 11 in connection with the yoke of Christ, where He says, “My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”There it is obviously our carrying the burden ourselves, and even then, in the context of Matthew 11, we see the Lord carries with us. Here in Gal. 6 the emphasis is on what we carry ourselves, according to our own responsibility towards God.

In Gal. 6:2, 5 both words are employed: "Bear ye one another's burdens (βά.) . . . . for every man shall bear his own burden (φο.)" We may and should in sympathy bear one another's troubles, and so on; but each one is responsible for his own 'bundle:' he cannot transfer it to another.

If one does not want to know it, he can likely persuade himself he is ignorant of it, but the righteous desire to know, and they consider the cause of the poor. Not that this means indiscriminate giving of money or of goods, but rather help wisely given, and in proper time.