What should I do when God says no?

We will all answer "yes" to this question. However, I wonder if we always like the answers that are given to our prayers? From the following Scriptures we will see that the answer is sometimes "no," sometimes "yes" and sometimes "wait." We shall also see that we are not always given to understand why the answers are as they are.

In 2 Corinthians 12: 9 we find Paul is given a "no" to his prayer. A serious affliction affected Paul and with exercise and effort in prayer he looked for relief. But the apostle was brought to realise that his burden was to remain in order that he might gain a fuller and richer appreciation of the grace of the Lord. There was to be an increased demonstration of the power of Christ in Paul's life through enduring and triumphing over the affliction. The answer came: "My grace is sufficient for thee." Like Paul we must learn that God has a better way forward and it may not be the way we expected. Such a learning process may not be easy.

We will all answer “yes” to this question. However, I wonder if we always like the answers that are given to our prayers? From the following Scriptures we will see that the answer is sometimes “no,” sometimes “yes” and sometimes “wait.” We shall also see that we are not always given to understand why the answers are as they are.

In 2 Corinthians 12:9 we find Paul is given a “no” to his prayer. A serious affliction affected Paul and with exercise and effort in prayer he looked for relief. But the apostle was brought to realise that his burden was to remain in order that he might gain a fuller and richer appreciation of the grace of the Lord. There was to be an increased demonstration of the power of Christ in Paul's life through enduring and triumphing over the affliction. The answer came: “My grace is sufficient for thee.” Like Paul we must learn that God has a better way forward and it may not be the way we expected. Such a learning process may not be easy.

But our spirits are not always up to this level, and we have already seen that Romans 8:26 - 28 recognizes this case. We know not what we should pray for as we ought; but the Spirit helpeth our infirmities. And He who searches our hearts knows how to take up all that is of His own Spirit in those hearts. As to the result, "we know" that all things work together for good to them that love God. And this gives peace whether our requests are granted or not. So we are not to restrain prayer because we are not on the highest plane of communion. On the contrary it is our privilege "in everything" to let our requests be made known unto God (Phil.4:6). An instructive example of this is Paul's prayer about the thorn in the flesh (2 Cor.12:8,9). For this thing he besought the Lord that it might depart from him. But his prayer was not in the intelligence of God's mind, who had a better thing in store for Paul, which Paul would have lost had his request been granted. The believer may indeed, as a chastisement, receive that which in unbrokenness he clamours for, but the result will not be happiness - as we read, "He gave them their request, but sent leanness into their soul" (Ps.106:15). To present our requests, with submission, is, however, always our privilege. The example of Paul shows this. He besought the Lord for his desire not once only, but thrice. In result, such submission was wrought in his soul that ultimately he took pleasure in the very infirmities of which he had implored the removal. A discontented and unsubject heart may reproach God with not answering its prayers; but in the retrospect of eternity, how much cause for praise may be discovered in the requests which our gracious God now refuses to grant.

But our spirits are not always up to this level, and we have already seen that Rom. 8:26-28 recognises this case. We know not what we should pray for as we ought; but the Spirit helpeth our infirmities. And He who searches our hearts knows how to take up all that is of His own Spirit in those hearts. As to the result, "we know" that all things work together for good to them that love God. And this gives peace, whether our requests are granted or not. So we are not to restrain prayer because we are not on the highest plane of communion. On the contrary, it is our privilege — in everything — to let our requests be made known unto God (Phil. 4:6). An instructive example of this is Paul's prayer about the thorn in the flesh (2 Cor. 12:8-9). For this thing he besought the Lord that it might depart from him. But his prayer was not in the intelligence of God's mind, who had a better thing in store for Paul, which Paul would have lost had his request been granted. The believer may indeed, as a chastisement, receive that which in unbrokenness he clamours for, but the result will not be happiness — as we read, "He gave them their request, but sent leanness into their soul" (Ps. 106:15). To present our requests, with submission, is, however, always our privilege. The example of Paul shows this. He besought the Lord for his desire not once only, but thrice. In result, such submission was wrought in his soul that ultimately he took pleasure in the very infirmities of which he had implored the removal. A discontented and unsubject heart may reproach God with not answering its prayers; but in the retrospect of eternity, how much cause for praise may be discovered in the requests which our gracious God now refuses to grant.

In prayer we can be assured that God sends the best answer He can. Paul prayed thrice for his thorn in the flesh to be removed. But better than granting the petition, God gave the answer, “My grace is sufficient for thee; for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” So that he gloried in the thing he besought might be removed.

Of course, believers often have requests that are not (or not yet) heard because God has a different plan for us. So it was even with Paul, who pleaded three times with the Lord to deliver him from the "thorn for the flesh" (2 Cor. 12:7, 8). The thorn was not taken away from him; he received grace in return, which enabled him to endure this pain and the limitations that came with it and to continue his ministry in the power of God.

God does not always answer our prayers by granting the thing that we request. Frequently, by not granting our requests, He indicates that His answer is, No. In the history of one Old Testament character — Elijah — we have examples of prayer, both answered and unanswered, of a most striking and instructive sort.

Deut. 3:23-28. "I besought the Lord at that time, saying, O Lord God, thou hast begun to show thy servant thy greatness and thy mighty hand: for what God is there in heaven or in earth, that can do according to thy works, and according to thy might? I pray thee, let me go over, and see the good land that is beyond Jordan, that goodly mountain, and Lebanon. But the Lord was wroth with me for your sakes, and would not hear me: and the Lord said unto me, Let it suffice thee; speak no more unto me of this matter. Get thee up into the top of Pisgah, and lift up thine eyes westward, and northward, and southward, and eastward, and behold it with thine eyes: for thou shalt not go over this Jordan. But charge Joshua, and encourage him, and strengthen him: for he shall go over before this people, and he shall cause them to inherit the land which thou shalt see." The Lord denies the prayer of His saint. The Lord may deny the prayers of His saints, or He may answer them in a way we little expect. It was thus in respect of Paul's thorn in the flesh: "For this cause," he tells us, "I besought the Lord thrice, that it might depart from me." (The prayer was not answered in the manner the apostle looked for it to be.) "And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness." (2 Cor. 12:8-9.) The thorn was needed! God may let, and sometimes does let, the consequences of the sin of a saint hang over him all the time he is here. The saint Moses prays, but the Lord denies the prayer of His saint. They have just come to the very border of the land, and Moses says, "Let me go over, and see the good land." But the Lord tells him, "Let it suffice thee; speak no more unto me of this matter." What graciousness there is in this "Let it suffice thee;" we see here all God's restoring mercy; it seems, so to speak, as if He hardly could deny Moses, as if, were he to be importunate, He could not refuse him. It was wiser, it was better, it was more for the glory of God, that Moses' prayer should not be answered; but there is something exquisitely tender in the reply of the Lord - "Let it suffice thee;" just as in that to Paul - "My grace is sufficient for thee."

No definite rule can be laid down with regard to such a matter. In some cases we are made to feel that our petition, for some wise reason, will not be granted, and that we are not at liberty to continue asking. Instances of this may be rare, but most assuredly they occur. Moses, when he prayed that he might be allowed to enter Canaan, was forbidden to repeat the request (Deut. 3:26).

Presenting our requests, subject to His will, is always right. Of this we have an example even in Gethsemane; so Paul for his thorn in the flesh. And the answer will be more glorious and blessed than the request, even when it does not as asked answer it. See John 12 and Ps. 132: so Psalm 21, and even Paul's request about the thorn. Let us trust His love, and this will not come short, and if He has given us faith to expect a specific answer, bless God for it. Only our will must not come in; even if it was answered (this was the case of the quails), but as a rule not, as James teaches. But where there is earnest faith, God will surely hear, though He may give us safeguards against our own will in it.