What is family according to the Bible?

All the way through the Scriptures starting at Genesis chapter 2 we see that in marriage a man and woman leave their parents and are joined together by God to set up a distinct family unit.

Those who dwell in a house under one head, including the wife and children, and embracing servants who were usually slaves. Gen. 15:2-3; Luke 12:42; Acts 10:7; Phil. 4:22. We read of the baptism of whole households. Acts 16:15; 1 Cor. 1:16. The Lord speaks of His disciples as His household, Matt. 10:25; and saints are called the 'household of faith,' and the 'household of God.' Gal. 6:10; Eph. 2:19.

The family is especially dealt with in the epistles which treat of the Church. Those epistles which take up Church order and rule take up also the order and rule of the family; and those epistles which show the Church as the body of Christ, show also how this relationship, and the principles it involves, affect the family life. Family relationships were instituted by God in Eden, and confirmed after the fall. Christianity does not change their outward character, but infuses into them new and divine principles. The husband is the responsible head of the house, and the mutual obligation subsisting between him and his wife, his children, and his servants, is the subject of the portion now before us. The question is not one of rights on either side, but rather of the way in which each, as having the life of Christ, should exhibit this in his conduct towards the other.

Marriage is the beginning of domestic life, and I want to urge that it has the Lord's sanction and that His presence may be known in the Christian home. It is in relation to the everyday home life that we read, “He hath said, I will never leave thee nor forsake thee” (Heb. 13). These God-ordained relationships in the natural sphere are being more and more despised in the world as godlessness increases, but it must not be so with us who desire to walk in the fear of God all the day long. Husbands and wives, parents and children, brothers and sisters: all these relationships may be sanctified by the Word of God and prayer to our blessing and God's glory; on the other hand, to be without natural affection and disobedience to parents are signs of the last days and of the steep descent that men are making into irretrievable apostasy.

"Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table" (Psa. 128:3). This verse gives us a beautiful picture of family life as God meant it to be. The outstanding feature of the vine is fruitfulness. The children being like olive plants would speak of prosperity and contentment. The table speaks of fellowship. These features should be found in a well-ordered home. Making a spiritual application of the verse to the church, we note that it is in 1 John that the saints are looked at as a family, with all the affections proper to it. They are seen as having been born of God, in possession of the same life, and bonded together in new relationships. In verse 3 of chapter 1 we have a fellowship outside of the world altogether, "... truly our fellowship is with the Father, and with His Son Jesus Christ." Further on in verse 7 the apostle writes of "fellowship one with another," the basis of this being "The blood of Jesus Christ His Son (which) cleanseth us from all sin." The fellowship here is not eccle­siastical. It is a bond of life which binds every saint into one family. As we come into contact with the saints, may this fellow­ship be real to us. We need it in a hostile world.

It will be noticed that the first relationships of which the Apostle speaks are those which had their existence in the Garden of Eden — wife and husband. Then we come to relationships which came into being after the fall — children and parents. Finally we come to relationships of which we hear nothing until after the flood — servants and masters (Genesis 9:25).

Take first the family. The value God Himself sets upon subjection to His order is seen in that familiar passage in which He commends Abraham, on the ground that "he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the Lord, to do justice and judgment," etc. (Gen. 18:19.) In the epistles of Ephesians and Colossians also what care is taken to enjoin on every member of the Christian household the fulfilment of their several relative responsibilities. Children and servants, as well as parents and masters, husbands and wives, are directed as to the duties of their respective positions. On the other hand, what sad examples of parental misrule and of filial disobedience are preserved in the Scriptures for our admonition and warning. The happiness of the families of Eli, Samuel, David, and many others, was wrecked simply because the parents in these cases did not establish and uphold the divine governmental order. And not only was it the case that the happiness of the family was destroyed, but the sin, whether of parental failure, or of the children's disobedience, brought with it the divine judgment. (Read, for example, 1 Sam. 3:11-14.)

In verses 18 to 21, we have practical exhortations in reference to the natural relationships established by God — wives, husbands, children, and fathers. Christianity, while introducing into relationships above the relationships of earth, does not set aside the natural relationships, while we are yet in the body. They were instituted by God, sanctioned by the Lord, and are to be respected by the Christian.

We have not come by any act of our own will into this blessed family of God, for, as James has written, it is God’s will that has brought us there. This is also seen in John 1:13, where it is written concerning those who receive the Son of God, “Which were born not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God.” We are not in God’s family by natural generation, as being descended from Abraham of from David. Had it been by blood sinners of the Gentiles would never have been blessed.

But meanwhile, what was He going to do? Was He merely pronouncing judgment on Israel? Far from it. While He yet was speaking to the people one came and told Him, "Behold, Thy mother and Thy brethren stand without, desiring to speak with Thee" (ver. 47). The Lord immediately takes this opportunity to show that He no longer acknowledged mere relationships according to the flesh. He had special relationship with Israel, "of whom as concerning the flesh Christ came." He owns it no longer. They would not have Him, and will become the tenement for the devil in all his power — their last state to be worse than their first. But, says the Lord, I am going to have a new thing now — a people according to My own heart. And so He stretches forth His hand toward His disciples, and says, "Behold My mother and My brethren." His only true relations were those who received the word of God, and did it. "Whosoever shall do the will of My Father which is in heaven, the same is My brother, and sister, and mother" — He renounced all earthly connection for the present time. The only tie He acknowledges now is relationship to a heavenly Father, formed through the word of God received into the soul.