What is false guilt, and how can I avoid it?

We are not yet done with your letter, dear friend. We think we discern another feature in your case which tends to produce the spiritual depression of which you complain. If we mistake not, you are afflicted with an unhealthy, gloomy conscience. This is a sore evil, a heavy burden, a very great trial. We deeply feel for anyone laboring under this grievous malady, for it not only affects oneself, but all with whom one comes in contact. There is a wide difference indeed between a scrupulous or exacting conscience and a tender conscience. The former is governed by its own fears; the latter by the Word of God. The former induces feebleness and uncertainty in all one's ways; the later, a holy stability and consistency. We can hardly conceive a more troublesome companion than a morbid, gloomy conscience. It is always creating difficulties for its possessor and placing stumbling-blocks in his way. But a tender conscience is invaluable. It resents only what ought to be resented. Its action is true and healthy. It does not morbidly seek out the cause of trouble and defilement, but being duly acted upon by the Word of God as applied by the Holy Spirit, it yields a true response and thus discharges with vigor its divinely appointed functions.

Coupled with a sense of guilt is a consciousness that we deserve to be punished. This increases our fear. God, who knows all about this, has said: "Be sure your sin will find you out" (Num. 32:23). We cannot have peace and true happiness until the question of our guilt is settled in a way that is just.

Our God-implanted conscience, part of the moral nature of man, makes us feel guilty when we have done something wrong. It also makes us realize that we deserve punishment. Some try to ease their guilt by joining a church and getting involved in religious activities, but they know deep down that this will never bring peace.

A bad conscience works in different ways, and is the cause of many trials for the soul, producing difficulties, doubts and fears, instead of introducing the heart into the sovereign love and blessing of God. Who has not come across this state can have little idea of the sufferings caused by it in a soul. Often a bad conscience is bound up with a legal mind, then the believer becomes a stranger to peace and joy by faith.

It is a dreadful moment in the soul's history when one wakes up to the consciousness of having committed sin — sin against light, knowledge, and privilege — sin against divine grace and goodness. Satan is sure to be specially busy at such a crisis. He casts in the most terrible suggestions — raises all manner of questions — fills the heart with legal reasonings, doubts, and fears — causes the soul to totter on the foundation.

I have said that there are two things, which, though quite distinct, are nevertheless frequently confounded in the minds of the saints - a bad conscience and the "groaning" of the spiritual man because of evil around. The moment we get a little away from the sense of grace we shall be in danger of confusing these together. Suppose, for instance, that I, as a saint, am sensible of the terrible weight of evil which is all around me, and groan about it, soon (unless it be guarded against) this will mix itself up with trouble of conscience; I shall lose the sense of God's love, and put myself under law.

I have said that there are two things which, though quite distinct, are nevertheless frequently confounded in the minds of the saints - a bad conscience, and the groaning of the spiritual man because of evil around. The moment we get a little away from the sense of grace, we shall be in danger of confusing these together. Suppose for instance that I, as a saint, am sensible of the terrible weight of evil which is all around me, and groan about it, soon (unless it be guarded against) this will mix itself up with trouble of conscience; I shall lose the sense of God's love and put myself under law. But a saint may "groan" thus without at all losing the consciousness of love, nay, for the very reason that he has it.

1885 240 The question is how far the conscience is entirely and perfectly clear before God: not if one has a doctrinal certainty by faith that God will not impute, which is quite right; but if the conscience is entirely purified as a present thing in the presence of God. If not, Satan has a handle against us. And this peace of the conscience cannot be had till we have judged our sin as God judges it; for this is the effect of the light, that is, of God's presence. It is thus that truth in the inward parts, or practical purifying, goes on with conscience-purifying. The great thing is for one to be one's self before God: for this, it is well to be assured as a doctrinal certainty that God cannot impute anything to the believer, for that is of faith; but then going to God that one's conscience may be perfectly in the light and all right with God. If this be so, there will be no need of much speaking to man.

I have thought it necessary, more closely to enter upon this difference between consciousness of sin in ourselves and conscience of sins before God, as the confounding these two truths tends to keep so many dear souls of God's children at a fearful distance from God, instead of following His gracious invitation to "draw near to Him with a true heart, in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water" (Heb. 10:22).

This is no proof of conversion; it is only the main proof that man has got into a bad conscience, and cannot get out of it. Adam and Eve dare not look at each other, nor yet to God. They cannot bear the condition they have got into, and they cannot change it, therefore they hide it. But do not mistake this for repentance. Shame merely drives them to hide from, and excuse themselves to, God. And so with ourselves: as long as the shame of sin continues, we try to hide it, to get away from it; but it only drives us farther and farther from God. It is not a divinely-taught conscience, because we are more concerned about the shame before men than the sinfulness before God. Until God has the place which man now occupies in our hearts, there is no conversion: the soul is not looking to God. We may be able to reason about the tender love and grace of God, but our sense of the guilt of sin should ever be deeper than that of its shame. When the conscience is before God, guilt brings sorrow; and yet we can as sinners reckon upon the love and the kindness of God.

This is no proof of conversion. It is only the main proof that man has got into a bad conscience and cannot get out of it. Adam and Eve dare not look at each other, nor yet to God. They cannot bear the condition they have got into, and they cannot change it, therefore they hide it. But do not mistake this for repentance. Shame merely drives them to hide from, and excuse themselves to, God. And so with ourselves. As long as the shame of sin continues, we try to hide it, to get away from it, but it only drives us further and further from God. It is not a divinely-taught conscience, because we are more concerned about the shame before men, than the sinfulness before God. Until God has the place which man now occupies in our hearts, there is no conversion, the soul is not looking to God. We may be able to reason about the tender love and grace of God, but our sense of the guilt of sin should ever be deeper than that of its shame. When the conscience is before God, guilt brings sorrow, and yet we can, as sinners, reckon upon the love and kindness of God.