What are the stages of love in Song of Solomon?
Hamilton Smith divides the Song into six Canticles, each a stage of love: (1) The assurance of love, (2) The awakening of love, (3) The communion of love, (4) The restoration of love, (5) The witness of love, (6) The triumph of love.
Hamilton Smith"In the course of these dialogues we have, first, the unfolding of the infinite and unchanging love of the Bridegroom; second, the development and growth of the love of the bride, and how she is established in relationship with the Bridegroom, brought into the enjoyment of his love and raised from her lowly position to share the throne of the king — her exalted Bridegroom."
"Thus, it will be seen, LOVE is the great theme of the Song of Songs — the love of Christ. Under the figures of the Bridegroom and the bride it speaks of all those sweet affections that Christ kindles in the hearts of His own."
W. Kelly traces a three-fold progression in how the bride expresses her relationship:
Stage 1 (Cant. 2:16): "My beloved is mine, and I am his"
"the first thing that the soul wants, is to know what we find in the second chapter — that Christ is mine."
Stage 2 (Cant. 6:3): "I am my beloved's, and my beloved is mine"
"And this marks a very decided progress in her soul — in the affections of Jerusalem… Now, you see, she knows Him. She is perfectly satisfied that He is hers."
Stage 3 (Cant. 7:10): "I am my beloved's, and his desire is toward me"
"There is now the arriving at a settled sense of love — the possession of His love. 'I am my beloved's, and his desire is toward me.' It is not necessary to say 'He is mine.' … She began with 'My beloved is mine,' but now she rests in this."
J. N. Darby frames the progression as affections moving from desire toward established relationship:
J. N. Darby"The desire of one who loves, and is seeking the affections of the beloved object, is not the sweet, entire, and established affection of the wife, with whom marriage has formed an indissoluble union. To the former the relationship is only in desire, the consequence of the state of heart; to the latter the state of heart is the consequence of the relationship."
The progression moves from longing and desire through assurance, communion, failure and restoration, to settled rest and public witness. Kelly's three-fold formula captures it concisely: the soul moves from "He is mine" (grasping Christ) to "I am His" (belonging to Christ) to resting in "His desire is toward me" (absorbed in His love, self forgotten).