And to all these [add] love, which is the bond of perfectness.
The verse closes a list of what the new life puts on — mercy, kindness, forbearance, forgiveness — and then names one thing to go over all of them. Commentators ask why love ranks highest, and what it means to call it a bond that ties everything together in perfection; older translations end the verse with "the bond of perfectness," which is the wording the writers below use.
The garment that finishes the outfit
Love is not one more item alongside the others; it is what makes the rest hold.
To the Colossians he says, "Above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfectness." It completes all the rest. Without it there is a gap that no mix of the other qualities can fill.
Commentators differ on how to read "above all these." Some take love as standing over the list. Others take it as added into the list, so that every item springs from love.
It is not, as some translations put it, "Above all these things put on love", as if love were a separate quality standing above all the others. Add love to the mercy, the kindness, and all the other qualities. All these blessed activities of the new man are to spring from love. If we show mercy, or kindness, or forbearance, or forgiveness, it should be because we love our brother.
Love brings God into the picture
Love outranks the rest because it is God's own nature in action, not just a good attitude toward people.
There is more in love than simple kindness and forgiveness; it goes beyond these. Love always brings in God, being the activity of His nature. In His nature He is light, but the energy of that nature is love going out in goodness to others.
Not the same thing as being nice
This love comes from God. So it is not the same as a naturally gentle nature, which can fail at the very point where holiness is needed.
But all this is not natural gentleness. He says, "Above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfectness." This is the real love of God. It perfects a thing and makes it divine. It is not the mild nature we see so often, with no power to resist and no firmness of character — the kind of person who cannot say "no." Many people find it torture to say "no," even when staying silent would grieve the Spirit. That is human kindness, not divine love. This bond of perfectness is a holy thing.
Wider than affection for fellow believers
Warm feeling among Christians is not the same as this love. Affection that goes no further than fellow believers lets them set the standard for how you act.
It is quite true that love between believers is a sweet and precious fruit of grace. It is precious in the heart that is full of it, and precious as it grows between them. But it is not the love this verse means. When love between believers becomes an end in itself, other believers become the motive and the rule of our conduct. Then our conduct is as uncertain as the state of the believers we happen to meet. So the apostle says, "Above all these put on love, which is the bond of perfectness."
What the bond ties
A bond works in two directions at once. It ties the qualities together, and it ties together the people who show them.
It is called the 'bond of perfectness' because it binds in two ways. First, it binds these different qualities together by keeping their divine character. They belong to the moral nature of God, which every believer shares. They must never turn into, or be mistaken for, a naturally pleasant manner. Second, when the life and character of Christ show in these qualities, believers are held together in practice, and the local church keeps its unity and its witness.
Loving without waiting for a reason
Practically, the command does not depend on finding your brother or sister lovable.
I will always find something in my brother and my sister which does not invite me to show love. But there is no need to wait for an invitation. Because the love of God has been poured out in my heart, I can love the other without finding a reason in him or her to do so. Love is the bond of perfectness. Love is not everything, but without love everything is nothing.
Where this love is present, imperfections elsewhere lose their power to damage.
Be united, closely united, united in that charity which is the bond of perfectness. No blessing without that; nothing will be lacking where love abounds… But if there are imperfections it is love and union which will prevent their bad effects.
Summary
- Source — love is the activity of God's own nature, so putting it on brings God into every dealing with others.
- Standard — a mild nature that cannot say "no" is not this love. This bond is a holy thing, and that is how you tell it from mere niceness.
- Scope — affection that reaches only fellow believers makes them the measure of your conduct. This love keeps God as the measure.
- Strength — the bond holds twice over: it keeps the other graces divine in character, and it holds believers together in practice.
- Sum — you can have every other quality and still be missing the one thing only love supplies.