1 Timothy 3:4

It is plain that this is not at all a question of spiritual gift. A man might have a good gift and yet not have a well-ordered house. Perhaps the wife does not behave well, or the children are unruly. Whatever his gift, if the wife or the family were a dishonour, he could not be an overseer. (This is the simple and true meaning of "bishop.")

Moreover, his own house must be orderly, his children in subjection, for this was the very proving ground of his ability to keep order in the assembly.

Do you know today a single truly semnos man, except the Man Christ Jesus? And yet, the deacons and their wives, and also the aged men were all to be semnos. The overseers especially are to have this quality; and Titus was to show the young men an example of it, in his own life. So we see that old and young, men and women, all are to show forth a semnos life.

He was also to be a man who ruled his house well, with his children in subjection. These instructions show that the overseer was an elder — married, with a home of his own, and with children.

An elder or overseer needed more than a suitable gift for his work. In his family and his circumstances he also had to be free from any appearance of scandal on the name of the Lord. He must have a good report, and be morally irreproachable in himself and his household. There might be trial or sorrow — few families were without both. But the concern here is something that damaged the public standing of the assembly. For this very reason the main thing for local oversight was moral weight.

It is important, too, to see that a man who could not rule his own house and have his children in subjection was not fit to guide in the Church of God. In that case there was some lack in his character, some weakness, or an inability to govern himself. I fear that this plain instruction is often set aside. We have seen men prominent in overseership whose households were entirely beyond their control and a scandal in the world. Only disaster can come from disregarding Scripture.

What I want to press on every Christian head of a house is this. The whole thing, from one end to the other, should bear the stamp of God's presence and God's authority. Every member should openly acknowledge God. Everything should be run so that it draws out the confession, "God is here." And this is not so that people praise the head of the house for his influence and good management. It is simply so that God may be glorified. This is not too much to aim at. We should never settle for less. A Christian's house should be a miniature of the house of God — not so much in the actual state of each member, as in the moral order and godly arrangement of the whole.

Today we have no apostles, and no apostolic delegates, to appoint elders. For anyone to claim such authority would be mere pretension… Still, we are to profit by these directions. From them we learn what qualities still show that a man is fitted to watch over the Lord's interests, and to guide others in keeping order and godliness in local assemblies.