Rejoice with those that rejoice, weep with those that weep.
Paul has just told the Christians in Rome how to use their gifts and how to make love real. Now he turns to daily life with other people: their good news and their grief. The verse asks less about what we say to a happy or hurting person. It asks whether we are free enough from ourselves to feel what they feel.
The command follows a run of instructions about love, generosity and forgiveness. Sympathy flows from a heart already rooted in love.
We have been urged to love, to do good to others, and to forgive our enemies. Now we are told to share in the joys and sorrows of other people, and especially of fellow Christians. Rooted and grounded in love, these graces flow out naturally, as from their own spring. What could be more unlike the spirit of Christianity than a selfish indifference to every interest but our own! How much more like the blessed Master is the Christian who enters into the joys and sorrows of others as if they were his own! This is the true expression of the fellowship of the saints. It is the unselfishness of those who walk in the light of God's own presence. That presence is the only place where we lose our selfishness.
Both halves press against something in us. Which is harder depends on how our own life is going.
Do others have cause for rejoicing? Let us rejoice with them! This may not be easy if there are thorns or sorrows in our own path, but it is true, unselfish Christian character. Or do others weep? Let us weep with them. We may not be so ready if our own life is going well. It is a pointed test of our selfishness or unselfishness.
Elsewhere the same writer names what this verse replaces: envy.
We cannot get rid of this covetous attitude unless the Lord Jesus works in our hearts by new birth. His work makes us willing to judge our motives and to live by wholehearted faith. Then, instead of envying others, we shall know how to "rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep." We shall be glad if others are blessed, even if we go without.
Saying the right thing at a funeral is one thing. Carrying another person's trouble is another.
If we want to sympathize with those who suffer, we must take their sorrows on ourselves. Just speaking a word of comfort to someone is not genuine sympathy. We must take on the trials of others and carry them on our own spirit. For such a service we need the Spirit of the Master within us. We learn His comfort for ourselves first, and then pass the same comfort on to others.
John the Baptist's followers buried him and went to tell Jesus. Commentators point to that scene as the verse lived out before Paul wrote it.
There was not another heart on earth in which they could have found such a response as in the tender, loving heart of Jesus. His sympathy was perfect. He knew all about their sorrow. He knew their loss and how they would be feeling it. They therefore acted wisely when "they went and told Jesus." His ear was always open and His heart always ready to comfort and sympathize. He perfectly lived out the command the Holy Spirit later put into words: "Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep."
Sympathy like this has a source and a condition.
So we can rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep. The cause for our joy or weeping is not in ourselves but in others, and our sympathy is divine and gracious. But we must be wholly with Christ to do it truly, and truly human to feel it, as He was. In our case this assumes we are dead to self, because in us self is selfishness.
Ignoring this command is not neutral. It costs us.
With all this, we are not to be shut up in ourselves. We are to "rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep." How much joy is open to us this way that we never take! And how much sorrow do we shut ourselves out of, when that sorrow is the very school God would use to make us fruitful!
- Source. Sympathy is not a personality trait. It overflows from a heart rooted in love. In God's presence we stop being selfish.
- Test. Rejoicing is hard when your own path has thorns. Weeping is hard when your own life is comfortable. Each half exposes self from a different side.
- Cost. Real sympathy carries the other person's trouble on your own spirit. A word of comfort by itself is not what the verse commands.
- Model. Jesus received the grief of John's followers with a heart always ready to comfort. He lived the verse before Paul wrote it.
- Gain. Shutting ourselves in costs us joy we could have shared. It also costs us sorrow God would have used as a school to make us fruitful.
Have the same respect one for another, not minding high things, but going along with the lowly be not wise in your own eyes
Paul is listing practical marks of Christian love. Here he reaches the place where pride most often breaks fellowship: how believers rank one another, and what it means to go along with the lowly.
The first command calls for agreement. One writer shows where that agreement comes from.
"Be of the same mind one toward another." This plainly means that in the things of God there ought to be oneness of mind among His children. But we are addressed here as the children of faith. The word of God forms and governs our thoughts and affections, our motives and aims. When this is the case, there must be agreement, since the word of God is one. But whenever it is a question of human opinions, there must be discord, for each one will have his own opinion.
How far does that sameness of mind go?
This does not mean, of course, that everyone must think alike on every subject. But if all let that self-effacing mind be in them which was also in Christ Jesus, what perfect harmony would result! Shall we put it to the test?
Why does a call for harmony need a warning about "high things"?
Nothing hinders unity and love more than pride. So the apostle now urges the saints not to be ambitious, but humble, and to watch against self-conceit.
The same writer is realistic about how deeply this instinct runs:
It is natural for man to aspire to things above him, and to look with some contempt on lowly people and lowly pursuits... Even the best of Christians find it hard to throw off completely the influence of rank and station in this life. Nothing seems to have a more stubborn grip on the natural mind. It does not die until the body dies.
Older English versions read "condescend to men of low estate." Commentators say that wording misses the point:
The critics do not think "condescend to men of low estate" is a good rendering. It means rather to associate with them. The idea of condescension goes against the teaching of the Lord and of His servant. It assumes that we keep worldly superiority in our own hearts, because it means showing kindness to the lowly in a patronising way.
Another draws out what the true sense costs us:
"Condescend to" keeps our social station as men "living in the world". But as Christians we died with Christ to this and far more. So we are called to carry ourselves away from it all, and along with the lowly ones (or, lowly things).
The test is how a gathering of Christians values people:
In social matters, we must beware of letting the spirit of the world into the Christian circle. That spirit values people by their birth, wealth, or social position. We are to have the same respect for the poor brother as for the rich. We must refuse the natural vanity of the flesh that thinks much of "high things".
Going along with the lowly also puts us where God Himself is found:
Are believers lowly and of little account in this world? Then let them remember that the Lord delights to associate with such. We read, "Though the LORD is high, He regards the lowly, but the haughty He knows from afar" (Ps. 138:6). To indulge the pride of the flesh and boast in birth and worldly position separates us from the excellent of the earth. It puts us "afar off" from God.
The last clause guards against a pride that grows out of very little:
Self-conceit is quite often the offspring of weakness and ignorance. An imagined superiority to those around us puffs up the mind. We disregard the opinions of the lowly, and self-confidence naturally follows. Where this pride shows itself among Christians, it destroys the prosperity of the church and hinders the blessing of the individual. May the Lord give us the spirit of a little child — humble, teachable, dependent.
There is a subtler trap in the very act of mixing with the lowly:
"Going along with the lowly" is true greatness and genuine Christian grace. "Be not wise in your own eyes" is an important companion to it, for seeking to impress others — perhaps especially the lowly — is a real danger.
The whole verse runs against the grain of the world. Its pattern is the Lord Himself.
What a contrast with the self-exalting and disdainful spirit of the world! How blessed to see it lived out in the human path of the high and lofty One who inhabits eternity, whose name is holy... Here we have exhortations to Christians. Whoever says he abides in Him ought himself to walk in the same way in which He walked.
- One mind — agreement grows where God's word governs our thinking. Human opinion gives as many views as there are minds.
- One obstacle — pride is the greatest hindrance to unity and love. The pull of rank and station dies only when the body dies.
- One correction — "condescend" is the wrong idea; it keeps our social superiority intact. The call is to go along with the lowly.
- One measuring line — value no one by birth, wealth or position; the same respect is due to the poor brother as to the rich.
- One pattern — the high and lofty One walked this way; whoever claims to abide in Him should walk as He walked.