If a woman also vow a vow to Jehovah, and bind herself by a bond, in her father's house in her youth,
Numbers 30 is about vows — promises made to the LORD — and it treats a man's word and a woman's differently. Verse 3 turns to a young daughter who makes such a promise while still living at home, and her father can undo it.
The chapter sets two standards side by side:
The subject is the confirmation or annulling of vows. If a man vows a vow to Jehovah, he must do without fail all that he has sworn to do. If a woman vows, however, there are conditions which determine whether it shall bind or not. So, if she is young and in her father's house, he may disallow the oath, and then it does not bind her; or she may be married, and her husband disallow it. But if these keep silence, or she is a widow or divorced, then her vow remains against her, and she is debtor to fulfil it.
Note the timing: the father must speak when she makes the vow, not later.
It was different for a young woman who still lived with her father. If she made a vow, her father could overrule it at the time she made it. If he did not overrule it, the law obliged her to keep it.
The daughter has a way out; the man in verse 2 has none. That difference is the hinge of the chapter.
There was no relief for the man. He was bound to go right through with whatever had come out of his mouth. Whatever he undertook to do, he was solemnly and irreversibly held to it. There was no back door, as we say — no way of getting out of it.
Commentators read that unbreakable word as pointing beyond any human speaker. As one puts it of the man who never has to take back what he said:
Do we not know who this is? We know the One who never needs to recall a word: indeed, there is none other. His word stands; we can trust it without fear.
Several writers read the woman here as a picture of a whole community.
Others have noted that in Scripture a woman often pictures a system or a community, and it may be so here. Israel as a community pledged themselves to obey the law of God. Their vow was never disallowed. To this day they suffer the consequences of their failure under God's government.
Another writer looks at that pledge at Sinai, and at why God let it stand:
Israel took such vows upon themselves at Sinai, and the result proved what a "rash utterance of the lips" it was. "The law made nothing perfect": grace alone could do this. Yet God did not disallow it. He was "Father" and "Husband" to them, and the vow was spoken in His hearing. Still He left it in force, in the wisdom of His government and in tender care for man himself.
One writer finds two ways God answered Israel's rash words — in grace, and in the way He governs:
Many a rash word they said; many a foolish vow they made. How did He treat all? In two ways. He acted in the power of His own grace, and so He disallowed what was wrong. He did not bind the foolish vow on her who spoke so carelessly with her lips… On the other hand, in His governmental wisdom, He might let the foolish prove her own folly; and so He did… But the day is surely coming when He will act in the fulness of His grace. All that is foolish will be as unheard, unrecorded, and blotted out for ever.
Another writer names the day when Israel's vow is finally lifted:
One day God will disallow the vow Israel has put herself under, and then He receives Israel back into favour. "And the LORD will forgive her."
Not every vow in Scripture was made by someone too weak to keep it.
But some vows were not taken rashly by those too weak to fulfil them. They were made by One who is mighty, One on whom God has laid help. If the woman's vows stand, thank God, so do the Man's!
One writer turns to this chapter when a disciple had spoken words he should never have said:
How blessed that he had, and that we have, to do with One who does not stay silent and so bind the soul with a bond! He knows when and how to disallow the foolish, even God-dishonouring word, so that it does not stand and the soul is forgiven. (See Numbers 30.)
- Heard. A daughter makes her vow within her father's hearing, and his answer at that moment decides everything.
- Silence binds. If he says nothing, the pledge stands and she must pay it — silence is consent, not neutrality.
- A word frees. If he overrules her, not one of her bonds holds, and the Lord forgives her.
- Israel bound. The nation pledged obedience at Sinai. God did not cancel that vow, and Israel has lived under it ever since.
- Christ's vow. Christ made the one pledge no one could annul, and He kept it. So grace, not our own performance, can answer the vow that still stands against the weak.
and her father hear her vow, and her bond wherewith she hath bound her soul, and her father shall be silent at her, then all her vows shall stand, and every bond wherewith she hath bound her soul shall stand.
A young woman makes a promise to God while still living in her father's house. Everything turns on what her father does when he hears it. If he says nothing, his silence is consent, and her word holds.
Several conditions decide whether a woman's vow binds her:
If a man vows a vow to the Lord, he must do without fail all that he has sworn to do. If a woman vows, however, there are conditions which decide whether it binds her or not. If she is young and in her father's house, he may disallow the oath. Then it does not bind her. Or she may be married, and her husband may disallow it. But if these keep silence, or she is a widow or divorced, then her vow remains against her, and she is bound to fulfil it.
A man is held to his own words. A woman's word stands or falls with someone over her. One writer reads that position as a picture of God's people:
This is our position, as it was that of Israel. They held the place of the woman according to the type of this chapter, as the man was the Lord Messiah, no doubt, in its full import. But it was the Lord who spoke, and His words stood; the Lord Messiah was the unfailing One of Israel.
Israel took vows like this in God's hearing, and He did not cancel them:
Numbers 30 deals with the vows of women. It also points to what happened to Israel. They did take these vows upon themselves, in the hearing of God, and He has not cancelled them in His government here below. Israel has stayed responsible for the vow it bound itself with — and, on the other hand, the precious Saviour had to take the burden of that vow upon Himself.
A vow left standing must then be paid. Here "bonds" are the pledges named in the verse:
Looked at from the side of God's government, the Lord is at once the Father and the Husband. He has kept silent toward her, so He lets her vows and bonds stand. To this day she is suffering the consequences, and feeling the force of those words: "It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay."
The other half of the law is the happier half. One writer sees the good news of it in the way the Lord handled Peter's rash words:
How blessed that he had, and that we have, to do with One who does not keep silent so as to bind the soul with a bond! He knows when and how to disallow the foolish and even God-dishonouring word, so that it shall not stand and the soul is forgiven. (See Num. 30.) The Lord made Peter's words completely void the moment He heard them, in the grace which corrects every fault, and bore all our iniquity.
Not every vow is made by someone too weak to keep it:
But there are vows not rashly undertaken by those too feeble to fulfil them, but by One upon whom, as one that is mighty, God has laid help. If the woman's vows stand, thank God, so do the Man's!
And the rash words of God's people will not stand for ever:
But the day is surely coming when He will act in the fullness of His grace, and everything foolish will be as if never heard, never recorded, and blotted out for ever.
One writer turns this chapter into a practical caution:
I do not believe that it is right for a New Testament believer to make a vow. If we truly understood the plague of our own hearts, we would not dare trust ourselves to be able to perform what we have promised. It is better to tell the Lord that we love Him truly, and want to please Him, but that we need Him to help us. "For it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure" (Phil. 2:13).
- Silence binds. If the father hears and says nothing, the vow stands. If he disallows it, it never binds her.
- Dependence protects. Her word does not rest on her own strength but on the one over her — a position commentators read as Israel's, and ours.
- Israel bound itself. The nation took its vows in God's hearing, and He did not cancel them.
- Government let it stand. Held to their own word, they still feel the weight of a vow made and not paid.
- Grace overrules. The One who disallows our foolish words has Himself made a vow that needed no cancelling. One day every foolish word of His people will be blotted out.