But concerning virgins, I have no commandment of [the] Lord; but I give my opinion, as having received mercy of [the] Lord to be faithful.
Paul turns from married believers to the unmarried. He has no command from the Lord here, so he gives his judgment — and the verse itself says why that judgment carries weight.
The ESV calls them "the betrothed." Older translations read "virgins" here. One writer notes how wide the term is, and what Paul did with the question:
Concerning virgins (1 Cor. 7:25) — the term here applies to both sexes — Paul had no commandment; but he gave his judgment. In view of the present distress, he writes, it is good for a person to remain as he is. He sets out the advantages of that condition (vv. 32-35) and reminds them how near the end is (vv. 29-31). But he does not enforce celibacy.
Some read "I have no command from the Lord" as a crack in the authority of Scripture. Commentators answer that the opposite is true: God inspired the distinction itself.
Everything written in God's word is inspired, the last part of the chapter just as truly as the first. Earlier in the chapter the apostle had shown that the Lord decided the general rule of marriage, and that he himself decided the special case of mixed marriage. So here God inspired him to give the unmarried no commandment from the Lord, but his own judgment. If ever a man was entitled to form and express one, he was.
Darby answers those who use these words to argue that not all of Scripture is inspired:
Some would argue, from his saying "I have no commandment," that not all is inspired. Yes, he was inspired. Modern attempts prove how important it was that the God of grace pointed out the difference so precisely — the difference between Paul expressing his experience by the Spirit, and a revelation by the Spirit which carried the direct force of a commandment.
Why is there no command here at all? One writer sees the Lord leaving the matter free:
They had asked his advice on this question too, but he has no definite answer to give. The Lord will put no yoke on them. Here, as in the other matters in this chapter, He will leave grace to work freely, with no rule that either requires or forbids. But Paul has received mercy, and he serves as a steward of the grace of God. So he will give them his judgment on this point too.
The verse names Paul's credential: mercy from the Lord. One writer draws out what that rules out:
His words are not those of a master, but of one who had received mercy from the Lord to be faithful (1 Cor. 7:25). Neither he nor his fellow workers in the ministry had rule over their faith.
Kelly explains why Paul stayed single, and what kind of thing that choice is:
Paul was acting in the spirit of the Lord's words when he gives us his own judgment as one who had "obtained mercy of the Lord to be faithful" (1 Cor. 7:25)... With a wife or family to care for, he could not have done the Lord's work so thoroughly. So the apostle gives his wise and gracious judgment, not as a command, but as something left to weigh on the spiritual mind... But note, it is a gift, not a law, much less a caste. Only those receive it "to whom it is given." It is put as a privilege.
Because Paul gives no command, some treat his words as advice they can take or leave. One writer replies:
In verses 6, 10, 25 and 40 he separates two things: what the Lord definitely commanded, and what he judged to be right and pleasing to the Lord where the Lord gave no distinct command. After giving his spiritual judgment, he adds these telling words: "And I think that I too have the Spirit of God." If that is so, I trust none of us will set Paul's judgment aside lightly.
- Mercy first. Paul's authority to speak here rests on mercy received, not rank held — the words of a man kept faithful, not of a master over anyone's faith.
- Mercy makes room. Where mercy rules, the Lord lays no yoke; He leaves grace to work freely here, with no rule that either requires or forbids.
- Mercy still speaks. The silence is not a gap in inspiration; God inspired Paul to mark the difference between a command and a spiritual judgment.
- Mercy offers, never orders. Single life for the Lord comes as a gift and a privilege, given to some — not a rule, and never a higher class.
- Mercy weighs. No command does not mean no weight: no one should lightly set aside the judgment of a man who had the Spirit of God.
I think then that this is good, on account of the present necessity, that [it is] good for a man to remain so as he is.
Paul is giving advice about marriage, and here he turns to the unmarried. His counsel rests on a pressure he calls "the present distress" — so what is it, and how binding is advice Paul gives as his own judgment?
Paul marks off this section from the parts of the letter where he speaks with the Lord's authority. One writer notes how carefully he does it:
In verse 25 Paul carefully guards the instructions that follow, so that no one can turn them into absolute commands and trap people (v. 35). They are only his judgment. Yet it is judgment of a very spiritual order, for the last words of the chapter say something telling: "I think that I too have the Spirit of God." How these instructions of the Spirit applied depended on the spiritual state of those who heard them. So Paul was inspired to issue no command but to give his judgment.
That distinction shapes how we take the counsel: weighty, but not a chain.
The counsel of an inspired apostle never can be wrong, but may not be applicable in every case. They had consulted Paul as if he were an oracle, and his answers carry that weight — but they are not commands. When he speaks about what is wise in Christian life, he speaks as a spiritual guide of the highest authority. But his voice is not the commandment of the Lord.
Everything turns on the word "present." Kelly tests it against its use elsewhere:
It is not a coming necessity but a present one that makes it best to remain as you are. That is the force of the word everywhere else in the New Testament and in other writings. It existed then; it was not merely on the way. I know of no reason to think it does not exist still, as it will until the Lord comes... Until the day of the Lord the earth is a scene of wickedness, confusion, and misery. Why act like someone who wants a settled life there, if you really are a pilgrim and a stranger?
Kelly adds that Paul is not looking at some end-time crisis. He points instead to the steady clash between the gospel and the world: "the gospel always meets hostility where the world, in the purity of that gospel, discovers its own doom."
Commentators differ on how wide the distress reaches. Some read it as a passing local trouble. Others argue the pressure never lifted:
What is meant by these words? Most take them to mean that the apostle is pointing to some temporary, particular pressure that the Church might later come out of. But this is surely at odds with the whole tenor of his teaching in this chapter. What he describes here is not, I am persuaded, exceptional, but general. The present necessity is the present time, the burden of their life of patience here below.
Another writer sets out the reasons behind the word "good":
The apostle has spoken to those who were married when God called them. Now he gives his advice to the unmarried. The world is in a condition of distress and need. The time is short, and its weeping and rejoicing will soon be over, for the fashion of this world is passing. Because of all this he judges that it is good for a Christian to be free from earthly ties. This does not mean that a man bound to a wife should seek to be free. But if he is free, it is better to remain so.
The counsel never turns into an accusation against those who marry:
As a rule the apostle commends a single life to the Christian. But he guards that counsel from misuse. The married should not seek to end their marriage, and the single should not seek to be bound in that way. Again, he would keep the conscience free for those who might marry. Neither man nor woman sins by marrying, however unwise that step may be in the Christian judgment.
The whole chapter leaves the choice with the willing heart:
God has compassion on the natural weakness of His children. He lets them know that complete self-denial is the better way, a way always open to the willing soul. Yet He forces no one into it, for self-denial must be voluntary if it is to be acceptable. We are not chained to our post, but urged to remain there.
- Present, not coming. The word means a pressure already here, not one drawing near — and it lasts until the Lord comes.
- Local, or lasting. Commentators differ. Some read a passing local trouble. Others read the ongoing burden of a life of patience in a world at odds with the gospel.
- Judgment, not law. Paul gives no command on purpose, so no one is trapped. His advice carries weight, but it does not bind the conscience.
- Good, not holier. Staying single frees a Christian from earthly ties in a passing world. It never makes anyone a higher class of Christian.
- Free, not chained. Marrying is no sin. Self-denial counts only when a person chooses it, so Paul urges — he never forces.
Art thou bound to a wife? seek not to be loosed; art thou free from a wife? do not seek a wife.
Paul's counsel about the unmarried is his own judgment, not a command from the Lord. Here he puts two blunt questions: one to the married man, one to the free man. Both answers point the same way: do not go looking for a change of condition.
The apostle draws a sharp line between what the Lord commands and what he himself advises. This verse falls on the advice side.
He answers the question of whether marriage was good or not, given the actual circumstances. He tells them this is simply a matter of giving advice. He has no commandment from the Lord. He keeps that completely separate from any judgment he may give as a faithful man — which, through the mercy of the Lord to him, he was known to be. His spiritual judgment might therefore be of the greatest value to those who used it rightly... In short, it was a matter for each person to weigh and settle. No one could decide another's course.
Yet that advice still carries weight. Paul ends the chapter by saying he too has the Spirit of God:
In verses 6, 10, 25 and 40, he separates what the Lord clearly commanded from what he judged to be right and pleasing to the Lord, where the Lord gave no distinct command. After giving his spiritual judgment, he adds these telling words: "and I think that I too have the Spirit of God." So I trust that none of us wants to set aside Paul's judgment lightly.
The advice rests on what these writers call the "present necessity." Commentators differ over what that means. One ties it to the weight of the world on the young Church:
The apostle speaks of a "present necessity." He seems to mean the immense pressure of the world on the young Church. That would make getting tangled in unnecessary cares something not to be desired.
Another reads it as a pressure that has never lifted:
It is not a coming necessity but a present one that makes it best to remain as one is. That is the force of the word everywhere else in the New Testament and in other writings. It existed then; it was not merely on its way. And I know of no reason to think it does not exist still, as it will until the Lord comes... Until the day of the Lord, the earth is a scene of wickedness, confusion, and misery. So why act like someone who enjoys a settled life there, if you really are a pilgrim and a stranger?
The two questions are not one piece of advice but a fence on both sides. The married man is not to use Paul's preference for singleness as a reason to get out.
Yet the apostle guards against the abuse of his usual advice to Christians to stay single. The married should not seek to end the marriage, any more than the single should seek to be bound by it. And again, he would keep the conscience free for those who might marry. Neither man nor woman sins by marrying, however unwise Christian judgment may think it.
Being free from a wife can come about in more than one way.
A spirit of contentment is what he seeks to encourage. If one were "free from a wife," by her death, or by her leaving to marry another, his advice is: "Do not seek a wife."
The decision turns on what is driving it. Every believer already carries a load, and marriage swaps one load for another.
Besides the common duty of contending for the faith, each believer has his own "necessity" or burden. Let him bear it patiently with God. To seek a wife might be to find a blessing or a snare. If he is thinking about any change of state, let him know well what motives are prompting him. Let him pause before he trades his present burden for another that may be even heavier.
The counsel has a purpose behind it: fewer cares, and more freedom to serve.
Christians who enter the married state do no wrong, but they will have trouble in the flesh and add to their cares. The Apostle would, as far as possible, have us without care, so that we might serve the Lord without distraction.
- Advice — Paul gives his own judgment here, not a command from the Lord. But it is the judgment of a faithful apostle who says he has the Spirit of God.
- Necessity — the advice rests on a present necessity. Some read that as the world's weight on the young Church, others as a pressure that lasts until the Lord comes.
- Stay — the counsel runs both directions: the bound must not seek release, and the free must not seek a bond.
- Weigh — neither marrying nor staying single is sin. So the test is your motive for wanting change, and whether the new burden is heavier than the old.
- Serve — the goal of the whole passage is a life with fewer cares and fewer distractions, free to please the Lord.
But if thou shouldest also marry, thou hast not sinned; and if the virgin marry, they have not sinned but such shall have tribulation in the flesh; but I spare you.
Paul has just urged the unmarried to stay as they are. Now he clears the conscience of anyone who marries, warns of the trouble it brings, and then refuses to press the point.
Paul recommends the single life. That advice could harden into a rule, but it does not. It cuts both ways: the married should not try to escape, and the single are under no duty to marry.
Yet the apostle guards against any misuse of his advice that a Christian is usually better off single. The married should not seek to end the marriage, any more than the single should seek to be bound by one; and again he would keep the conscience free for those who might marry. Neither man nor woman sins by marrying, however unwise it may be in Christian judgment. For trouble in the flesh is certain for such, and the apostle wanted them spared this.
Paul has already said he has no command from the Lord on this point. That does not make his words less than Scripture.
Much here is the apostle's advice about giving way to nature, which is entirely lawful, or not giving way to it in the matter of marriage. It is not the Lord's commandment. Still, we must remember that when he gives his apostolic advice, it is inspired advice, the advice of the Holy Spirit.
The advice rests on the pressure Paul named two verses earlier. Commentators differ on what that pressure is. One reading takes it as the world's lasting hostility to the gospel — real then, real still:
It is not a coming pressure but a present one that makes it best to stay as one is... It was there already, not merely on the way; and I know of no reason to think it does not still exist, as it will until the Lord comes... Until the day of the Lord the earth is a scene of wickedness, confusion, and misery. Why live like someone who wants a settled home there, if you really are a pilgrim and a stranger?
Another writer rejects the common view that Paul means a passing crisis. He reads it as the everyday burden every believer carries in this life:
The present necessity is the present time — the burden of their life of patient endurance here on earth... But besides the task shared by all, of contending for the faith, each believer has his own "necessity" or "burden." Let him carry it patiently with God.
Marriage brings problems the single never meet. So the choice calls for God's clear guidance, not haste. Older translations render the ESV's "worldly troubles" as "trouble in the flesh," the wording these writers use.
And it is possible for one to marry while in a bad state of soul (1 Tim. 5:11,12), and reap sad results. In any case, one should seek the clear guidance of God in a matter so serious, and not rush into something he is not ready for. Marriage itself, as Paul says, will bring "trouble in the flesh": the married man will face many problems that never come to a single one. Let everyone who is thinking of marriage be ready for this.
The verse ends without detail. Paul could have listed the troubles. He stays silent instead, out of sympathy.
But this advice lays such an unwelcome restraint on the heart and on our very nature that he must have felt that the permission of God's first ordinance would... generally be followed rather than the apostle's warning. And like the One who noticed the weakness of the flesh without scolding it, his sympathies are with the weak. To be honest with them, he shows them what marriage brings; but by refusing to dwell on such a subject, he spares himself as well as them.
No one bears this trouble alone. It becomes the very place where Christ meets the need.
If a man marries, he will have trouble in the flesh, though it is quite right for a man to marry. Still, we learn that Christ suits our need, and we prove the comfort of His love in the time of trouble. In such times Christ is manna... If I have a sick wife, I ought to feel for her; such things are sure to come.
- Free. Paul keeps the conscience free on both sides. The single need not marry, the married must not seek release, and no one sins either way.
- Advised. What he gives is a judgment, not a command — yet still inspired advice, the advice of the Holy Spirit.
- Pressured. The advice grows out of the "present distress." Commentators differ: some read it as the world's lasting hostility to the gospel, others as the plain burden of life here.
- Forewarned. Marriage brings real trouble in the flesh: cares the unmarried never meet. Weigh the step before God, and do not rush.
- Spared. Paul stops short instead of pressing the warning, because he feels for the weak. And in the trouble he foresees, Christ Himself is the manna that meets the need.
But this I say, brethren, the time is straitened. For the rest, that they who have wives, be as not having [any]
Paul has been advising the Corinthians about marriage and single life. Now he gives the reason behind all of it. One fact governs the whole of life — marriage, sorrow, joy, buying, using the world: the time has been cut short.
Older translations read "the time is short," or "straitened." One writer traces that word and finds it points to something squeezed together:
We are to recognise that "the time is short," or "straitened." The word used means contracted as to space. It is used in only one other place in the New Testament — Acts 5:6, about Ananias being wrapped up for burial. How often we fail to see that we live in a straitened time! The death and resurrection of Christ have narrowed the issue. So we should hold all we have in the world with a light hand, ready to leave at a moment's notice.
One writer names the point in history when the time was cut short:
This is no commonplace remark on how short time is. It is the solemn statement that the time has been shortened from now on — that is, as I suppose, since Christ's death and the call of the church. It was shortened so that the believer should hold everything but Christ with a loose hand: all the things in which men might rejoice, however sorrowful their lot may be. But the Saviour has changed everything for the Christian. He looks on the earth as the place of Christ's rejection. He follows Him in spirit into the heavens now opened, and from there he waits for Him in peace, with joy unspeakable and full of glory. This world has no more permanence than the shifting scenes of a theatre.
Paul never names the Lord's return here. Yet the same writer says the whole passage rests on it. The world's outlook depends on denying it.
Not a word here formally brings in the return of our Lord Jesus Christ. Yet it all rests deeply on that great and most influential truth, held as a living and constant expectation. What does the entire course of the world depend on? It takes for granted ages to come for man and his progress here below. So it denies in practice, and often openly, the Lord's coming as a real hope, or even as truth. What fills man with vainglory? What kindles his enthusiasm, or steels him to labour and endurance? Would any of it be found if he believed the Lord was coming? Clearly not.
Some twist "as though they had none" into an excuse. One writer answers that it cannot cancel what Paul commands earlier in the same chapter.
This does not give anyone a warrant to neglect his wife. That would directly contradict the instruction the Holy Spirit gave through the same apostle in our chapter. Suppose a Christian husband used that passage as a warrant for neglecting his wife and children, day after day and evening after evening, so as to exercise his gift in a wider circle. The inevitable result will be that the state of his wife and children will soon close the door on his service.
The same balance is struck elsewhere. God set up these ties, and a new power lifts us above them without denying them:
God established certain relationships… Sin has come in and spoiled everything. A new power has come in which, while fully recognising them as of God, and using them as pictures of the highest spiritual relationships with Christ and the Father, has nothing to do with them — is above them and outside them. As a rule those who talk much about being dead to nature do so because they are not… "Dead to nature" is legality.
Paul's aim in all of this is positive:
The apostle only wanted them to be free from anxiety and distraction, so that they might serve the Lord. If reckoning themselves dead to nature did not produce this effect, they gained nothing — they lost by it… If they mastered and silenced the will of nature, they served the Lord without distraction. They lived by the Spirit and not by nature, even in the things God had ordained as good for nature.
The verse does not condemn marriage, tears, laughter or property. It puts them in their place, as things that end.
Some things last only for a time — marriage, weeping, rejoicing over present circumstances, buying, using the world. They were not matters that should take up too much time and attention. If they are things God gives for our present comfort, they must never enslave us in any way. They must not so occupy our interest that eternal realities grow dim and lose the place that belongs to them. For all that is present is passing.
- Shortened — "Short" means compressed or contracted. The death and resurrection of Christ narrowed the time; this is not just a remark about how brief life is.
- Expecting — Behind the shortened time stands the Lord's coming. Paul never names it, yet the world denies it and plans as if history will roll on.
- Holding — Because the time is contracted, hold everything but Christ with a light hand, ready to leave at a moment's notice.
- Honouring — "As though they had none" never excuses neglect of a wife or children. That would contradict what the same apostle commands in the same chapter.
- Serving — The goal is a heart free from distraction. Enjoy God's passing gifts, but never let them own you.
and they that weep, as not weeping; and they that rejoice, as not rejoicing; and they that buy, as not possessing;
Paul has just told the Corinthians that the appointed time has grown very short. Here he applies that to three things that grip the human heart: grief, gladness, and getting. Does this verse tell a Christian to feel less? Or to hold everything with a looser grip?
The instruction rests on the clause just before it. One writer explains why that shortened time loosens the believer's grip on everything else:
This is not a common remark on how brief time is. It is the solemn statement that the time has been shortened from now on — that is, as I take it, since Christ's death and the call of the church. The purpose is that the believer should hold everything but Christ with a loose hand, including all the things in which men might rejoice, however sorrowful their lot may be. But the Saviour has changed everything for the Christian. The Christian looks on the earth as the place where his Lord was rejected. He follows Him in spirit into the heavens now opened, and waits there in peace for Him, with joy unspeakable and full of glory. This world really has no more permanence than the shifting scenery of a theatre.
What is short is not just a lifespan. Another writer draws the line:
He does not reason on the brevity of life, but on the shortness of their allotted time of pilgrimage. With life, as men reckon it, they have already finished. Both dead and risen with Christ, their calling is to wait here as His witnesses until He comes. So let their thoughts suit their calling, and their actions suit their thoughts. The married should not long for a settled life here, and mourners should not long for more hopeful days. Their endless comfort will arrive when Jesus comes.
"Mourn as though they were not mourning" could sound like a call to suppress feeling. Commentators reject that reading. One writer says the Spirit deepens feeling instead of deadening it:
Christ does not ignore relationship, sorrow, joy, business, or position. Instead He brings in an energy of the Spirit for each one. That energy deepens sensitivity and respects everything God has established in nature and on earth. At the same time it raises us above it all and attaches us to Christ in heaven, who is about to come again.
Another writer sets this against stoicism, the philosophy of stamping out feeling:
This is not stoicism. Stoicism would try to hammer out all the higher feelings of nature in the stoic, and of the divine nature in the badly taught Christian. If my affections were as sensitive as Paul's were, I would have more feeling than I have. But in this sense my feelings are not just natural, fallen nature. They are new. I have Christ and His mind as their power and their regulation. Christ wept; but He wept in the sight of God, and He would not have been perfect as a man if He had not wept more than once.
One writer points to the Lord Himself, first at Bethany and then on the road to Jerusalem:
Resurrection was everything to Him. It was His relief in the sorrows of life, and His object in the middle of the promises and prospects of the world. It gave His soul a calm sunshine when dark, heavy clouds had gathered over Bethany. It moderated and separated His affections when the bright glare of a festive day lit up the road from there to Jerusalem. The thought of it made His mind holy equally in the grief and the enjoyments around Him.
The last part of the verse touches money and property. One writer turns it into a rule for the person whose business does well:
Let those who prosper seek their joys somewhere other than in this passing and uncertain world. Do not let the love of gain take the place of godliness. Gain glues men to the things of time. Godliness teaches us to handle God's things as our own... The believer should not live today as if he feared tomorrow might take his joy away. He should not lounge at ease in his inheritance. He should live as a steward who is wise to turn the money of unrighteousness to lasting account.
Another writer puts the whole passage into one rule about what a believer calls his own:
Christ has been rejected, and the power of evil has come in. Marriage is entirely lawful, and so on. Yet let even those who have wives be as though they had none (vv. 29-31). I am to use this world in everything as not a possession of mine, as not belonging to me.
- Short time. The season has been cut short since Christ's death and the calling of the church. Nothing here is worth a settled grip.
- Loose hand. Short time is the reason for the loose hold. Hold everything but Christ lightly. Mourners need not long for happier days here. Their lasting comfort comes when Jesus comes.
- Deeper feeling. This is not stoicism. The Spirit deepens feeling and lifts the heart above it. Christ wept, and would not have been perfect as a man if He had not.
- Christ's example. Resurrection steadied Him at Bethany and in Jerusalem's festive crowd alike. That is what it means to mourn as though not mourning, and to rejoice as though not rejoicing.
- Stewardship, not ownership. Buy, but do not own. Handle what you hold as a steward. Use the world as something that does not belong to you.
and they that use the world, as not disposing of it as their own; for the fashion of this world passes.
Paul writes to believers in the middle of ordinary life — marriage, business, buying, grieving, celebrating. He tells them how to hold all of it, and gives one reason: the present form of this world is passing away. Older translations call that form the "fashion" of this world — the wording in the quotes below.
Older translations render Paul's word as "abuse." That makes the verse sound like a warning against excess only. Commentators say the word means something different, and that the mistake has done real damage.
The word translated "abuse" appears only here and in 1 Corinthians 9:18. "Abuse" is one fair way to render its classical use. But once you understand the Christian's relationship to the world, and the apostle's argument, that meaning cannot be accepted. We have good reason to fear that a great deal of worldliness has hidden behind this mistake. Another meaning, given even in the dictionaries, fits far better: "to do what one likes with" a thing, or "to exercise absolute power over" it. The Christian is in the world, but not of it; and, as the apostle reminds us, the fashion of this world passes away. We do not belong to the world, and it does not belong to us.
So the line is not between moderate use and excess. It is between handling a thing and owning it.
There is no thought of "abusing" in it. "Abuse" is a bad word, but it is hard to give the sense in one word; no single English word suits. As for the other passage — "using this world and not abusing it" — you hear it quoted by people who are up to their neck in it. It means using this world without having it in your possession — simply handling it, and not as property.
Paul's reason is not that life in general is short. One writer ties the shortened time to a turning point, and pictures this world as a stage set.
This is not a commonplace remark about how short life is. It is a solemn statement that the time has been shortened from now on — since Christ's death and the calling of the church, I take it. The purpose is that the believer should hold everything but Christ with a loose hand. That includes all the things men might be glad about, however sad their circumstances. The Saviour has changed everything for the Christian. He looks on the earth as the place where Christ was rejected, and follows Him in spirit into the heavens now opened. From there he waits for Him in peace, with joy unspeakable and full of glory. This world has really no more permanence than the shifting scenes of a theatre.
Paul does not say the world vanishes. He says its form goes. One writer uses this verse to explain what Scripture means when it says the heavens and the earth pass away.
Yet the heavens and the earth pass away — that is, in the form in which we now know them. Or, as the apostle says to the Corinthians, "the fashion of this world passes away" (1 Corinthians 7:31). Other scriptures assure us that this is the sense in which we are to understand it.
If the world is not ours to dispose of, one answer would be to own as little as possible. One writer points elsewhere — away from hoarding, and away from strict self-denial too.
So the disciple, if he is wise in a heavenly way, will not try to pile up or hold on to the wealth that many men call their own. He will gain from the rich grace of God, who does not call him to a life of self-denial, yet frees him from selfishness… Knowing that the fashion of this world passes, he keeps his eye on the everlasting dwellings. Instead of disposing of the world as their own, and so either hoarding it or enjoying it selfishly, they give away right and left.
The verse sits inside Paul's advice to the married and the unmarried. The passing world shapes that advice, though it forbids no one to marry.
The world at present is full of distress and need. The time is short, and its weeping and rejoicing will soon be over, for the fashion of this world is passing. So he judges that it is good for a Christian to be free from earthly ties… Still, Christians who marry do no wrong; but they will have trouble in this life and will add to their cares. The apostle would have us free from care, as far as possible, so that we can serve the Lord without distraction.
- Handle, don't hold. The word behind "abuse" means using a thing as your own. Paul's call is to handle the world, not to own it.
- Misread, misused. Read as a ban on excess only, the verse has sheltered real worldliness.
- Loose hand. The season is short, so hold everything but Christ with a loose hand — weeping, rejoicing, buying and marrying included.
- Form, not existence. What passes is the world in the shape we now know it, the shifting scenery of a stage, not creation itself.
- Free to give, free to serve. Grace frees you from selfishness without demanding a life of self-denial. The open hand gives away, and serves the Lord without distraction.
But I wish you to be without care. The unmarried cares for the things of the Lord, how he shall please the Lord;
Paul is dealing with marriage in this chapter, and here he gives the reason behind his advice: he wants them free from anxious care. Two questions follow. Is Paul putting marriage down? Is the single life a higher calling?
Paul's first aim is not the single life. It is a mind free from worry. One writer points out that Paul describes what usually happens, not what has to happen:
There was another matter to be considered as well. The great and important thing in his eyes was that people should live free from care. He wanted them free from that weight of anxiety which would disturb their walk with God. In fact, he is not speaking of what should be, or of what has to be, but of what is so often found. The unmarried person would naturally be concerned for the things of the Lord, and for pleasing Him. He has no one else to please.
Another writer pictures the single believer as a runner carrying less weight. Paul urges this freedom, yet he ties no one down:
Here the apostle presses the greater freedom from everyday anxiety which the single man or woman enjoys, compared with the married. It is freedom for serving and pleasing the Lord. There is less weight in the race and less distraction from the goal. Yet even here the apostle speaks with caution and delicacy. He would not tie anyone down. He sought their good, with an eye to what is fitting and to undistracted waiting on the Lord.
Paul goes on to say that the married man is anxious about worldly things. One commentator denies that this is a rebuke, and reads it as part of a husband's proper place:
The apostle speaks here in a positive way, because he is measuring Christian character, not as it too often shows itself, but at its true worth as the proper effect of faith. The unmarried saint is joined to his Redeemer, and seeks to please Him by caring for His things... He does not quite mean it as a reproach when he adds, "The married man cares for the world." Within proper limits, this is right for his position. He is no longer free, as before; nor may he deny his wife, even for Christ's sake, as he might deny himself. To love his wife, and honour her, are now among the settled duties of his place. In carrying them out, he may find himself both lower and less happy, spiritually, than when he lived only for the Lord.
Another writer sets this verse beside verse 7 of the same chapter, and warns against copying Paul's path without Paul's gift:
1 Corinthians 7:32-34 teaches that the unmarried are the most free from care. But verse 7 teaches just as clearly that "every man has his own proper gift of God." Each one must know for himself what his own gift is... It is a fatal mistake to expect to walk in a path for which God has not given you a call, or the spiritual power... Marriage is a holy and honourable institution. God established it in the Garden of Eden, and He gave it His approval by His presence at Cana of Galilee.
Being single is an opportunity, not a guarantee. One writer reminds us that God has often used married believers more:
Of course it does not follow that this is always the case. A believer may be unmarried for other reasons, and may not be making the Lord the supreme object of his life... Of course we know that, despite this, God has used and blessed many married men far more than many others who have stayed unmarried.
Freedom from care goes deeper than being single or married. One writer traces it to reckoning yourself dead to the claims of nature:
The apostle only wanted them free from anxiety and distraction, so that they might serve the Lord. If reckoning themselves dead to nature did not produce this effect, they gained nothing; they lost by it... If they subdued and silenced the will of nature, they served the Lord without distraction. They lived according to the Spirit and not according to nature, even in the things God had appointed as good for nature.
- Care — the whole passage aims at anxiety, the weight that disturbs a believer's walk with God. Marriage comes up only as it adds to that weight.
- Freedom — the unmarried person carries less weight in the race. He has no one else to please, so less pulls him from the goal.
- Fairness — the married man's care for his wife is not a rebuke. Loving and honouring her are settled duties of his place. He is no longer as free as before.
- Gift — Paul offers his own path; he does not command it. Each person must know his own gift from God. Walking a path God has not given is a fatal mistake.
- Result — Paul seeks undistracted service. That comes from a will subdued and silenced, not from being married or single.
but he that has married cares for the things of the world, how he shall please his wife.
Paul weighs two ways of living for one Lord: the single believer has one person to please, while the married believer must please a wife as well. The verse does not scold the husband; it names what his position costs him.
The contrast serves one goal, named in the verse just before: freedom from anxious care. One writer puts the comparison in the language of a race.
Here the apostle points out how much freer the single man or woman is from earthly anxiety than the married, and so freer to serve and please the Lord. There is less weight in the race and less distraction from the goal. Yet even here the apostle speaks with care and gentleness. He would not trap anyone. He sought their good, aiming at what is fitting and at undistracted waiting on the Lord.
Being "anxious about worldly things" sounds like a charge. In its place, it names duties a husband is not free to drop.
He is not really making a reproach when he adds that the married man "is anxious about worldly things." Within proper limits this is right for his position. He is no longer free, as he was before. He may not deny his wife, even for Christ's sake, as he might deny himself. Loving his wife and honouring her are now among the settled duties of his place. In doing them, he may find himself both lower and less happy in spirit than when he lived only for the Lord.
Paul is not stating a rule for every marriage. He names the temptation that comes with a second person to please.
In fact, he is not speaking of what should be, or what has to be, but of what is so often found. The unmarried man would naturally care for the things of the Lord, to please Him. He has no one else to please. A married man clearly has another person to please. So he is at least tempted to care for the things of the world, to please his wife.
A wife shapes much of where her husband's care goes. Writing to a woman about to marry a man engaged in the Lord's work, one writer warns her plainly.
You are in a serious position. A wife always has great influence on a Christian husband. As the apostle teaches us, he is in danger of caring for the things of the world to please her. That danger is greater still when the husband is a worker for the Lord and has been blessed in that work… Do not try to weaken his energy. A wife sometimes likes to have her husband for herself. When her husband is the Lord's worker, that is a great evil… A husband must care for his wife, consider her, and do anything but neglect her. It is truly evil and sad when he neglects her.
The verse gives the single believer an advantage, but not a monopoly on usefulness.
A believer may be unmarried for other reasons, and may not really be making the Lord the supreme object of his life. But he does not have the care of a wife to take up his time and attention, so he should have more time for the Lord… Of course we know that, despite this, God has used and blessed many married men far more than many others who stayed unmarried.
Some turn this passage into a law, because Paul's own example is attractive. Verse 7 of the same chapter blocks that.
1 Corinthians 7:32-34 teaches that the unmarried are the most free from care. But verse 7 teaches just as plainly that "each has his own gift from God." Each one must know for himself what his own gift is… It is a fatal mistake for anyone to expect to walk a path for which God has not given him a call or the spiritual power. In these days of ritual and revived monastic life, remember that marriage is holy and honourable. God established it in the Garden of Eden, and He approved it by His presence at Cana in Galilee.
- Aim — Paul aims at undistracted service. The single believer runs with less weight and less distraction from the goal.
- Duty — A married man's care for worldly things belongs to his position, not to his sin. Loving and honouring his wife are now settled duties.
- Temptation — Paul describes what is often found, not what must be. A second person to please can pull the heart toward the things of the world.
- Influence — A wife who wants her husband for herself can weaken the energy of the Lord's worker. Even so, her husband must never neglect her.
- Freedom — This is counsel, not a vow. Each has his own gift from God, marriage is honourable, and God has used many married men more than many single ones.
There is a difference between the wife and the virgin. The unmarried cares for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and spirit; but she that has married cares for the things of the world, how she shall please her husband.
Paul has just said that a married man's concerns are split. Here he draws the same line for women — and raises the question of whether the single life is a higher grade of Christian.
The point of the whole passage is not the marriage bond itself but the weight it adds to a life already running a race.
Here the apostle presses one point. The single man or woman is freer from earthly anxiety than the married, and so freer to serve and please the Lord. There is less weight in the race and less distraction from the goal.
The term Paul uses is not limited to women. The value of staying single depends on what it is for.
It seems clear that in this passage the word "virgin" covers the unmarried of either sex. Here is the Apostle's teaching in short. Marriage is good, as is every institution God has set up. It is wholly right and allowed. Yet staying unmarried is better, if it is kept up so that the person is more fully at the Lord's disposal for His interests. If such people do not "attend upon the Lord without distraction," their celibacy may only cast a snare on them.
The wife's attention to worldly things is her duty, not a lapse. One writer names two sisters from the Gospels — Martha, who served, and Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet.
The wife is holy too, but her calling makes her more a "Martha" than a "Mary." She cares for her husband and obeys him. Pleasing him is her proper aim, so she also cares for the things of the world. To think now of the things of Christ, in the spirit of her unmarried liberty, would be to fail in her duties as a wife. For she is no longer her own.
Because of that, the choice deserves weighing before it is made:
Let her weigh this well when she is sought in marriage, and not lightly surrender the place she already holds in God's household.
Paul is not describing an achievement anyone can copy by decision. Earlier in the same chapter he says, "each has his own gift from God" (verse 7; the writer below uses an older wording).
1 Corinthians 7:32-34 teaches that the unmarried are the most free from care. But verse 7 teaches just as plainly that "every man has his own proper gift of God." Each one must know for himself what his proper gift is. It is one thing to say, "Follow Paul's example," and quite another to have the "proper gift" to do it. It is a fatal mistake for anyone to expect to walk in a path for which God has not given him a call or the spiritual power.
The advantage is real, but it rests on an inward condition God gives:
The unmarried state has its advantages where grace gives the right inward condition… But God does not give this to everyone. It is not of man's will but of divine grace. Make it a law, and you destroy the grace.
The verse states a tendency rather than a fixed law of the spiritual life.
In fact, he is not speaking of what should be or what needs to be, but of what is so often found. The unmarried person would naturally care for the things of the Lord, to please Him. He has no one else to please… He does not want to lay down rules, since keeping them might only be a snare to them. He wants them to seek to serve the Lord without distraction, whatever their course may be.
The remedy for a divided heart is not escape from marriage but a quieted will.
When married, they were occupied with things below, to please their wives and provide for their children. But they enjoyed a rest of mind. In it nature did not claim her rights with a will they had failed to silence, and they kept holiness of walk and of heart. If they brought the will of nature under and silenced it, they served the Lord without distraction.
- Divided — Marriage is good, but it divides. The married have a second person to please, and that adds weight to the race.
- Devoted — Staying single is better only when it is kept for the Lord's interests. Otherwise it becomes a snare instead of a gain.
- Given — The single life is a gift from God, not a target to aim at. Make it a law, and you destroy the grace in it.
- Honoured — The wife's care for her husband is her calling, not her failure. She is no longer her own, and pleasing him is her proper aim.
- Undistracted — The goal in every case, married or not, is to serve the Lord without distraction. That comes when the will of nature is silenced, not when circumstances change.
But I say this for your own profit; not that I may set a snare before you, but for what [is] seemly, and waiting on the Lord without distraction.
Paul has just weighed marriage against singleness. Now he explains why: he wants their good, not a rule laid over their lives, and his aim is their undivided devotion to the Lord.
The tone here is close to an apology:
Having set the better way before them, he now apologises for his words, while still holding his position. He speaks only in their interest as his spiritual children. He does not want to trap them in rash purposes, or have them tie themselves carelessly to resolutions which might prove painful to their flesh. But there is a spiritual beauty that he loved himself, and he would gladly see them captivated by it too. If God gave them strength, they might match him in the race of single-hearted zeal.
The word behind "restraint" is a strong one. Kelly gives his own translation of the phrase and shows the care in Paul's tone:
"Not that I may cast a snare [literally, a noose] over you, but for what is seemly and waiting on the Lord undistractedly." Here the apostle urges the greater freedom from earthly anxiety. The single man or woman is freer than the married to serve and please the Lord. There is less weight in the race and less distraction from the goal. Yet even here the apostle speaks with caution and delicacy. He would not entangle anyone; he sought their welfare with a view to what is fitting, and to undistracted attention on the Lord.
The snare is not marriage. It can just as easily be the single state held for its own sake:
The apostle's teaching may be summed up in this. Marriage is good, as is every divine institution. It is wholly right and permissible. Yet to remain unmarried is better, if a person keeps that state to be more wholly at the Lord's disposal for His interests. If such people do not "attend upon the Lord without distraction," their celibacy may only cast a snare upon them.
Older translations end the verse: "that you may attend upon the Lord without distraction." One writer describes what that phrase supposes about the soul:
The apostle's words have often made a deep impression on me. What do we know of this? The language supposes the soul living by faith inside the heavenly sanctuary. It holds communion with the Lord without a burden and without a care. This is the Spirit's desire for us all.
The obstacle is not always outward circumstance. It can be an unsettled heart:
Sadly, how little there is of that among us — so little real rest of heart and soul, and therefore so little real waiting on the Lord without distraction. It is impossible to make the Lord our one object while we are still an object to ourselves. It is impossible while our hearts are restless and burdened.
Paul's concern all through is the weight people carry, not the state they are in:
The great and important thing in his eyes was that people should live without care. He meant freedom from the weight of anxiety that would disturb them in their walk with God... He is not saying this, as he declares again, constantly guarding it, for anything but their profit. He does not want to lay down rules, since keeping them might only be a snare to them. He wants them to seek to serve the Lord without distraction, whatever their course may be. There was no sin, as he insists again — no sin at all in marriage.
Paul refuses to make a rule. Kelly traces where a system that makes one goes wrong, even when it began sincerely:
No doubt it grew out of a desire for thorough devotedness... The unmarried state has its advantages where grace gives the right inward condition. That condition would fit into suitable outward circumstances and lead to such a life and service as we see in the apostle himself. But this is not given to all, nor is it of man's will but of divine grace. Make it a law, and the grace is destroyed.
- Profit, not pressure — Paul gives his motive first. Everything here is for their good, and he binds no one.
- No noose — the word he uses means a snare thrown over a person. He will not throw one. Singleness held without devotion becomes that very snare.
- Care removed — the goal is a life free from the anxiety that disturbs the walk with God, married or single.
- Devotion undivided — undistracted attention means communion held without a burden. A restless heart cannot give it, even when it is free.
- Grace, never law — the single life helps only where grace gives the inward fitness. Make it a rule, and the grace is destroyed.
But if any one think that he behaves unseemly to his virginity, if he be beyond the flower of his age, and so it must be, let him do what he will, he does not sin let them marry.
Paul has just urged undivided devotion to the Lord, and now he turns to the person for whom staying single has become a strain. Two questions follow: who is "his betrothed," and does marrying mean settling for less?
The ESV says "his betrothed"; other translations read "his virgin." Commentators differ on who is meant. One reading takes the whole passage as a man's decision about himself. The verses that follow keep pressing on his own will and his own heart:
Here it is not a question of a man's daughter but of his own state... The strong emphasis on the heart's purpose — for instance, "one's own will" and "one's own heart" — fits perfectly if the question is one's own virginity. But how would it fit a daughter's? Applied to her they sound arbitrary and inconsiderate beyond measure.
The other reading keeps a father in view, and draws a warning out of it for anyone with authority over a young person's future:
Let the Christian father have due respect for the affections of his child. He should indeed commend the higher path to her. But he must not turn a privilege into a punishment by forcing her into a celibacy she does not want. It would be less fitting to be a discontented virgin than a rejoicing bride... A parent should never use his authority in a way that provokes a just anger in the child... If her affections are engaged to another, that is a necessity he ought to yield to. His virgin must not be his victim.
The ESV reads "if his passions are strong." Another translation points to age instead. That wording is not about being too old to marry. It marks the point where youthful impulse is past and a settled judgment is possible:
Verse 36 is more correctly given in Mr. Darby's New Translation. It reads: "if he be beyond the flower of his age, and so it must be... he does not sin: let them marry." When the fleeting beauty of youth is past, and one is old enough to know what he is doing, he may think it more fitting and becoming for him to be married. To marry is then certainly not sin.
"It is no sin" is the heart of the verse. Paul leaves the choice open on purpose:
In speaking this way the Apostle has our profit in view. He has no wish to set a snare for us. He does not want us caught in the delusion of being monks or nuns. That delusion has led to so much corruption in a large part of professing Christendom. He leaves all free to marry.
The danger comes when people turn a rare exception into a rule:
There is a spiritual energy that lifts the person who receives it above ordinary conditions. But God's institution, here marriage, stays just the same... Marriage is the rule God has laid down. As an exception, the Holy Spirit can and does raise this one or that above the need of marriage. It was a question of God's gift; so that he who marries does well, and he who does not marry does better. The world-church shows the contrast to this holy wisdom. It turns the exception of grace into a rule.
Marrying is no sin, but Paul goes on to the man who can hold the other path. What marks him is inward steadiness:
If he stood firm, and had power over his own will, that was the better way. If he married, he still did well. If he did not marry, it was better.
Paul writes "let him do as he wishes." So no one can settle this by copying another person's path:
1 Corinthians 7:32-34 teaches that the unmarried are the most free from care, but verse 7 just as clearly teaches that "every man has his own proper gift of God." Each one must know for himself what his proper gift is. It is one thing to say, "Follow Paul's example," and quite another to have the "proper gift" to do it. It is a fatal mistake for anyone to expect to walk in a path for which God has not given him a call or the spiritual power.
- Reading — Commentators differ. Some take "his betrothed" as the man's own single state. Others read it as a father deciding for his daughter. Both readings land on the same practical outcome — let them marry.
- Timing — "Beyond the flower of his age" marks the moment when youthful impulse has passed. The person is now old enough to know what he is doing.
- Freedom — "It is no sin" leaves the choice open. Vows of enforced celibacy turn a gift into a snare and have bred corruption.
- Firmness — The better path belongs only to the one who stands firm and has power over his own will.
- Gift — Each has his own gift from God. Copying another person's calling without the power for it is a fatal mistake.
But he who stands firm in his heart, having no need, but has authority over his own will, and has judged this in his heart to keep his own virginity, he does well.
Paul closes his answers about marriage with a man who has settled the matter in his own heart and stays single. But who is the "virgin" here — a daughter in his care, or his own unmarried state? Commentators differ.
One reading takes the man to be deciding about himself. The verse keeps saying "his own heart" and "his own will," which fits a choice about his own single life.
Here there is no question of a man's daughter but of his own state. The Lord deserves to have us wholly devoted to Himself… The great emphasis given to the heart's purpose (for instance, "one's own will" and "one's own heart") suits perfectly if it is a question of one's own virginity, but how a daughter's? Applied to a daughter, they sound arbitrary and inconsiderate beyond measure.
Others read the verse as a father deciding about a daughter in his care. From that reading comes a warning to fathers.
But arbitrary decisions that rest only on the sacrifice of another's happiness never please God. So let the Christian father have real respect for his child's affections. He should indeed commend the higher path to her. But he must not turn a privilege into a punishment by condemning her to a single life she does not want. … He would do better to keep her unmarried than to give her, if his own will were the only one sacrificed; but his virgin must not be his victim.
The word behind "firmly established" points to inner stability. It appears in only two other places.
The Greek word hedraios (from hedra, "a seat or sitting") carries the thought of being stable, firm, within. Besides Colossians 1:23 it occurs only in 1 Corinthians 7:37, "he that stands firm in his heart," and in 1 Corinthians 15:58, "my beloved brothers, be firm."
One writer roots that steadiness in the affections, not in effort.
Steadfastness does not come from our own effort; it springs from the affections being right with God.
The verse stacks three conditions: firmness, no necessity, and control over his own will. One writer sees in them the man Jesus described as making himself a eunuch for the kingdom.
But one might stand with firmness of faith, having no necessity for marriage, having control over his own will, and purposing that he will maintain his virginity. This is the case of one making himself a eunuch for the kingdom of heaven's sake (Matthew 19:12). If it is not too common, it is still blessedly commendable.
This path rests on a gift, and not everyone is given it.
1 Corinthians 7:32-34 teaches that the unmarried are the most free from care, but verse 7 just as clearly teaches that "every man has his own proper gift of God." Each one must know for himself what his proper gift is. It is one thing to say "Follow Paul's example," and quite another thing to have the "proper gift" to do it. It is a fatal mistake for anyone to expect to walk in a path for which God has not given him a call or given him the spiritual power.
One writer takes "virgin" here to cover unmarried people of either sex. He weighs the single state by whether it leaves a person free for the Lord.
It seems clear enough that in this passage the word "virgin" covers the unmarried of either sex. The Apostle's teaching can be summed up like this. Marriage is good, as is every divine institution; it is wholly right and permissible. Yet to stay unmarried is better, if it is kept up so as to leave a person more wholly at the Lord's disposal for His interests. If such people do not give the Lord their "undivided devotion," their single life may only become a snare to them.
The same writer warns about what happens when this choice is forced on people.
The unmarried state has its advantages where grace gives the right inward condition. That condition would surely fit suitable outward circumstances and lead to the kind of life and service we see in the apostle himself. But this is not given to all. It is not of man's will but of divine grace. Make it a law, and the grace is destroyed. A swift harvest of sin, shame, and misery then proclaims the wisdom of God's ways and the folly of Christendom.
- Gift, first. This path rests on "his own proper gift of God." Admiring Paul's example is not the same as having the power to follow it.
- Gift, then firmness. The word for standing firm means inward stability. That steadiness comes from affections right with God, not from effort.
- Gift, then freedom. He is under no necessity and has his desire under control. He is not straining against himself, and so he does well.
- Gift, then purpose. Staying single is better only when it leaves a person wholly at the Lord's disposal. Without that aim it can become a snare.
- Never a law. Commentators differ over whose choice this is — the man's own, or a father's for his daughter. They agree on the limit: make it a rule, and the grace is destroyed.
So that he that marries himself does well; and he that does not marry does better.
Paul ends his advice on marriage with a comparison, not a command. One choice is good; the other is better. So whose choice is Paul weighing? And does calling one path "better" make the other second-best?
Commentators differ over whose situation Paul has in view. One reading takes the whole passage as a man deciding about his own single state, not about a daughter:
There is no question here of a man's daughter but of his own state. The Lord deserves to have us wholly devoted to Himself... The great emphasis on the heart's purpose — for instance, "one's own will" and "one's own heart" — fits perfectly if the question is a person's own virginity. But how would it fit a daughter's?
Others read it as a father deciding whether to give his daughter in marriage. Even then, they say, he must not force her:
Should he then decide not to give her in marriage? As a rule, he says, that would be the better way (v. 38). But arbitrary decisions that only stand by sacrificing someone else's happiness never please God... let him not turn a privilege into a punishment by forcing her into a single life she does not want. It would be less fitting for her to be a resentful unmarried woman than a joyful bride.
The first half of the verse gives clean approval, not grudging permission. Paul keeps saying there is no sin in it at all:
There was no sin, as he insists again — there was no sin of any kind in marriage. But if a man had no need of marriage, if he had authority over himself and had settled it in his heart to stay single, he did well. So, on the other hand, he says, the one who marries does well, although if he does not, he may do better.
This better path means undivided devotion to Christ. And no one can take it up at will — it has to be given.
While there are cases where marriage is a positive duty, there was plainly a better place of undivided devotion to Christ. Blessed is the one who is given to serve the Lord this way, without hindrance. Still, it must be the gift of God.
The comparison only holds when the Lord's will is followed in either case. Staying single for the wrong reasons does not make anyone the better party.
"So then he who marries does well; but he who does not marry does better." This assumes in each case that the will of the Lord is followed. Simply marrying, if it is not "in the Lord," could mean dreadful disaster. And refusing to marry out of selfish, evil motives is certainly not better than marrying, if the Lord were leading one to marry.
Paul leaves everyone free to marry. Take that freedom away, and the result is corruption, not holiness:
The Apostle has our profit in view. He has no wish to set a trap for us. He does not want us drawn into the delusion of becoming monks or nuns, which has caused so much corruption in a large part of the professing Christian world. He leaves all free to marry.
The exception is real, and only God's call makes it. Damage starts when people turn it into a rule for everyone:
Grace may call a servant of God to a path that does not fit with being married. Only the call of God is supreme. Yet the one who is called that way still respects the ordinary rule, and never despises it because of the exception. Error takes hold of the exception — even error cannot survive without a scrap or show of truth — and turns that exception into a human rule. This is Satan taking the place and rights of the Lord. His aim is to bring God into contempt, and to dazzle man with the vain hope of higher holiness and lead him into the depths of corruption.
- Better, not holier. Marrying "does well." There is no sin of any kind in it. The contrast is good versus better, never clean versus unclean.
- Better means undivided. Staying single frees a person to serve Christ without a rival claim. It is not a higher spiritual grade.
- Better is a gift. God has to give that path. Admiring it is not the same as being able to walk it.
- Better needs the Lord's leading. Both halves of the verse assume obedience. Refusing marriage from selfish motives is not "better" at all.
- Better must never become law. Commentators warn what happens when this exception becomes a rule: corruption, not holiness.
A wife is bound for whatever time her husband lives; but if the husband be fallen asleep, she is free to be married to whom she will, only in [the] Lord.
Paul ends his long answer about marriage with the case of a widow. Her tie to her husband holds for life. His death ends it and leaves her free to marry again — with one boundary, "only in the Lord."
One writer sets the verse beside the parallel in Romans and marks the one exception Scripture allows:
Romans 7:1-2 rightly gives the legal side of this matter. Corinthians speaks instead of what is morally binding before God, so "by the law" does not belong here. It is clear that only death rightly does away with the marriage bond. Any other dissolving of the bond is abnormal. Yet it could be allowed to one partner if the other has in effect broken the bond by fornication (Matt. 19:9).
Paul's word for the husband's death is a gentle one: some translations read "fallen asleep." Readers have taken that to mean the soul itself sleeps. One writer answers by showing what sleep attaches to across the New Testament:
But you never find in Scripture the soul sleeping. The man sleeps, but always as identified with the body… Again in 1 Corinthians 7:39: "if her husband dies (falls asleep), she is free to be married to whom she wishes." There it is no question of soul or spirit.
Many have treated this freedom as a second-rate, shameful choice. Paul does the opposite. One writer sets his words against the church rules that came later:
The close of the chapter takes up widows in particular. It is a remarkable instance of the opposition between the apostle's mind and the church councils. They dared to treat a widow's marrying as so evil that the church had to refuse its approval and its prayers… Death separates. Not only the widower but the widow becomes free to marry again… Even here we find no such language as sprang up later, when people praised celibacy as the highest of Christian virtues and condemned remarriage as unchristian.
Another writer contrasts the widow with an unmarried daughter still under her father's care:
A virgin is not entirely at her own disposal; a widow is. In the first case the apostle directs the will of the parent, in the second the will of the woman. Liberty is the state of a believer, and arbitrary rules cannot change it. A second marriage stands on the same moral footing as the first. Only one restriction limits the Christian widow's freedom to give herself in marriage. If she marries, it must be in the Lord.
Paul limits the choice with three words. One writer separates them from the phrase "in Christ":
It can hardly be doubted that the expression "in the Lord" goes farther than "in Christ." Every believer is "in Christ," but there are very many who do not own His authority in practice. We could not truly say of such that they are "in the Lord," for the phrase means having one's life and walk in the circle where His Lordship is owned. When the apostle says that a widow may marry whom she will, only in the Lord, he does not mean, in our judgment, any converted person. He means we must weigh the practical state of the believer in question. One walking disorderly, or living in disobedience to the Lord's authority, would not come within the limits of the apostle's description.
It asks more than whether the other person believes. It asks whether the Lord is directing the step:
He might be drawn to a sister so different from himself in habits, circumstances, and age that the match would look wrong to others and prove unhappy for them both. Sadder still, the attraction may be to a mind so fleshly or worldly that it endangers his soul and his testimony… This scripture therefore seems to cover more than the bare fact of being in Christian fellowship. It teaches that the marrying should be in the Lord — guided for their good to His glory, and so by His direction.
The verse names a widow, but the principle does not stop there:
For Christians, 1 Corinthians 7:39 guards the limits of "will" with that one worthy principle: "only in the Lord." The immediate application is to a widow marrying again. But it would be absurd to restrict it to her, or to doubt that it applies equally to any Christian woman or man.
One writer applies this to a decision people often pray over:
There are certain things we do not need to pray about. If a young man sets his affections on an unbelieving young woman, he need not ask the Lord whether the marriage is His will. The Scriptures plainly forbid it… "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers" (2 Corinthians 6:14) is just as clear and emphatic.
- Bound — the tie holds for life. Only death rightly ends the marriage bond, with one exception: fornication.
- Asleep — Scripture calls the husband's death sleep, a word that belongs to the body, never to the soul.
- Free — this is real liberty, not a grudging permission. A second marriage stands on the same moral footing as the first.
- Only — one phrase limits that liberty. "In the Lord" asks more than whether the other person is converted; it weighs how he walks.
- Everyone — the case is a widow's, but the principle covers every Christian man and woman. No one needs to ask whether an unequal marriage is God's will.
But she is happier if she so remain, according to my judgment; but I think that *I* also have God's Spirit.
Paul closes his long answer about marriage with an opinion, not a rule. That raises two questions: how binding is an apostle's advice, and can Scripture be inspired without being a command?
The last words of the chapter sound like a friend's advice, not an order. That difference shapes how a reader should answer them.
An inspired apostle is still speaking here. But he speaks as a friendly counsellor and a true helper of their joy, not as a direct messenger of God to their consciences. He gives no positive command. His answer to their questions gives solid ground for faith to act on, since they are the words of an inspired teacher. Yet they claim no absolute obedience. They assume that the person asking has an exercised conscience. The decision belongs to that conscience, in the sight of God. Counsel is not command, except when spoken by the Lord Himself.
Being inspired does not turn advice into law. The words stay what Paul calls them.
All that is given here is given by inspiration, the advice as well as the command... The advice was inspired, but it was advice. Inspiration did not change its character in that respect. Calling it simply advice does not lower our thought of inspiration — advice is what he himself calls it.
So one letter holds two kinds of words, and the line between them matters.
Here he separates two things. One is his judgment; about this he could still appeal to them, since he had the Spirit to form and guide his experience. The other is a revelation from the Lord, which made a commandment... Some would argue, from his saying "I have no command from the Lord," that not everything is inspired. Yes, he was inspired. Modern attempts show how important it is that the God of grace marked the difference so exactly: on one side the Spirit expressing his experience, on the other a revelation by the Spirit that carried the direct force of a commandment.
Why does Paul sound so careful here, when elsewhere he commands?
Here again the apostle points out what he judged wiser on spiritual grounds. Had others given a different opinion? He, if any man might, gives his judgment as one who thought he had God's Spirit. He was inspired to put it this way. He was not of a doubtful mind. He was avoiding an express command from the Lord, and speaking instead as an apostle giving counsel.
Death ends the marriage tie, so the widow is free. Paul still advises against a second marriage, and one commentator shows on what ground.
The marriage tie of believers is for life. Death separates. So the widow, like the widower, becomes free to marry again. But the apostle gives his judgment against it — not on moral grounds, where only superstition could raise a question, but because remaining unmarried is the happier state.
Another writer warns of the snare Paul was careful to avoid.
He has no wish to lay a snare before us that might lead us into the delusion of being monks or nuns, which has caused so much corruption in a large part of professing Christendom. He leaves everyone free to marry, and adds a word about the widow, in case a question arises, that she is free to marry — only let it be "in the Lord". But he judges that he has the mind of the Lord in thinking she would be happier to remain free.
Paul's counsel in 1 Timothy can look like the opposite of this. Motive settles the difference.
He makes it very clear that this is a strictly personal opinion, not the commandment of the Lord. He himself stayed unmarried so that he could serve the Lord more fully, with an undivided heart. If the same motives keep younger women unmarried, who can question that this is the happier path for them? Yet we must face the fact that this is not the usual attitude among women, or among men either. 1 Timothy no doubt says what is usually most fitting, while 1 Corinthians 7 allows for the exception.
Advice is not a command. It still carries weight.
Having given his spiritual judgment, he adds these telling words: "And I think that I too have the Spirit of God." So I trust that none of us will lightly set aside Paul's judgment.
- Counsel — Paul answers as a friend, not as a messenger to the conscience. Counsel is not command unless the Lord Himself speaks it.
- Inspired — the advice is inspired, just as the commands are. Inspiration does not turn advice into law.
- Confident — "I think" is not doubt. Paul holds back an express command, yet claims the Spirit who shaped his judgment.
- Free — death ends the tie, so the widow may marry. Nothing here bans a second marriage or makes single life holier.
- Weighty — the choice rests with your own conscience before God. Even so, no one should set Paul's judgment aside lightly.